After school disclosure

This is a common and stressful situation, and the leader did the right thing by telling you. Here's what to pass along, roughly in order of urgency. ## Right now (if the child is still there) **Check for immediate danger.** If there's any sign the child is unsafe going home today (injuries, fear of going home, mention of someone hurting her, no safe adult picking up), call 911 or your local child protective services hotline now, before pickup. **Gentle follow-up is okay, but no interrogation.** The leader can say something like: - "Thank you for telling me. You can always talk to me." - "Are you safe? Is anyone hurting you?" - "Is there anything you need right now?" **What to avoid:** - Pressing for details or asking leading questions ("Did your dad hit you?") - Promising to keep it secret. Instead: "I might need to share this with people whose job is to help keep kids safe." - Reacting with shock or anger, or saying anything negative about her family - Confronting or questioning the parents at pickup ## Documentation (today, while it's fresh) Have the leader write down: - The child's **exact words**, in quotes - Date, time, and context (what they were doing, who was around) - The child's demeanor (quiet, upset, withdrawn) - Anything else observed recently: changes in behavior, hunger, hygiene, marks, comments Facts only, no interpretation. ## Reporting - **Follow your organization's child protection policy.** If you have one, pull it up now. - **Know your obligations.** In most places, staff who work with kids are mandated reporters. The standard is *reasonable suspicion*, not proof. You don't have to investigate or be sure, and investigating is actually not your role. - **"Bad at home" alone is vague.** It could mean divorce, money stress, or a sick family member, or it could mean abuse or neglect. If you're unsure whether it meets the threshold, **call your local CPS hotline and describe what happened.** They'll tell you whether it warrants a report. That call is never the wrong move. - In many jurisdictions, the person who heard the disclosure has a personal duty to report. Telling a supervisor may not fulfill it. Make sure the leader knows this. ## Going forward - The leader should keep being a warm, consistent presence for this child. Her trusting the leader enough to say something is meaningful. - Watch for further signs or disclosures and keep documenting. - Check in with the leader too. These moments weigh on people. ## A text you could send her > "You did exactly the right thing telling me. Is she still there, and does she seem safe going home today? Don't press her for details, just let her know she can talk to you anytime, and don't promise to keep secrets. Please write down exactly what she said, when, and how she seemed. I'll call you in a few minutes to figure out next steps, including whether we need to call CPS." If you tell me your state or country, I can help you find the right hotline number and reporting rules.

This is a common situation, and the leader did the right thing by reaching out. Here's what to tell her, roughly in order of priority. ## Right now **If the child might be in immediate danger** (visible injuries, says she's afraid to go home, mentions someone hurting her), call 911 or your local child protective services hotline right away. Don't wait. **If there's no immediate danger:** - **Stay calm and warm with the child.** She doesn't need to get more information out of her. Something simple works: *"Thank you for telling me. I'm really glad you did. You can talk to me anytime."* - **Don't push or interrogate.** No "Who? What happened? Did someone hit you?" Leading questions can upset the child and can interfere with any later investigation. Open, gentle invitations are fine: *"Do you want to tell me more?"* If she says no, respect that. - **Don't promise secrecy.** If the child asks her not to tell anyone, the leader should say something like: *"I can't promise that, because my job is to keep you safe. But I'll only tell people who can help."* - **Don't contact the parents** about this, and don't confront anyone. If something is wrong at home, that could put the child at risk. ## Within the next hour or so - **Write down exactly what was said**, in the child's words, plus the time, date, context, and the child's demeanor (got quiet, seemed upset, etc.). Facts only, no interpretation. - **Loop you (or your designated safeguarding lead) in formally**, per your program's child protection policy. ## The reporting question "Bad at home" is vague. It could mean anything from parents fighting or divorcing, to money problems, to abuse or neglect. But **staff aren't supposed to figure out which one it is.** That's CPS's job. - In most U.S. states, youth program staff are **mandated reporters**. The legal standard is usually *reasonable suspicion*, not proof. - If you're unsure whether this meets the threshold, **call your state's CPS hotline and consult.** They get calls like this constantly and can tell you whether to file a report. That call itself is often the right move when you're uncertain. - Check your organization's policy. Many require reporting to a supervisor *and* to CPS, and supervisor notification usually doesn't replace the individual's legal duty. ## Afterward - The leader should keep being a consistent, safe adult for this child. Kids often share more later with someone who didn't panic or push the first time. - Watch for other signs (changes in behavior, hunger, injuries, reluctance to go home) and document them. - Check in on the leader too. These moments are stressful, and she may need to debrief. ## Quick text you could send her > "Thanks for flagging this, you did the right thing. Don't push her for details, just let her know she can talk to you anytime and that you're glad she told you. Don't promise to keep it secret and don't mention it to her parents. Please write down exactly what she said and when, as close to her words as you can. If anything suggests she's in danger right now, call 911. Otherwise, I'll take it from here on next steps, and let's talk before pickup." If you tell me what state or country you're in, I can point you to the specific reporting hotline.

Here's what to tell her, plus a text you can send right now. ## Text you can send > Thanks for flagging this. You did the right thing. For now: > 1. Stay calm and keep things normal with her. Don't push for more details. > 2. If she says more, listen, thank her for telling you, and tell her you'll make sure she gets help. Don't promise to keep it secret. > 3. Write down exactly what she said, in her words, with the date and time. Note anything else you noticed, but stick to facts and don't guess. > 4. Don't contact her family about this. > 5. If she says she's afraid to go home or is in danger, call me right away (or 911 if it's urgent). > I'm taking it from here and will follow up with you today. ## What you should do next **Check for immediate danger.** If there's any sign she's unsafe right now or afraid to go home, call 911 or your local child protective services before pickup. **Follow your organization's child protection policy today.** Bring in your designated safeguarding lead or director if that isn't you. Many states treat youth program staff as mandated reporters. "Bad at home" by itself may not be enough to report, but it's a judgment call to make with someone else, not alone. **Get advice if you're unsure whether to report.** In the US, the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (**1-800-422-4453**, 24/7) can help you think it through. You can also call your local child protective services and ask. If you have reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect, make the report. You don't need proof. **Plan a gentle follow-up.** Ask the group leader, or another adult she trusts, to check in with her tomorrow. Keep it low-key, something like "I'm glad you told me yesterday. I'm here if you want to talk." Keep her routine steady. **Keep it private.** Share what she said only with the people who need to know to keep her safe. **Check in on your group leader too.** Moments like this are stressful. Let her know she handled it well and that she isn't carrying it alone. If you tell me your state or country, I can point you to the right reporting line.

Tell her she did the right thing by reaching out, and that her job right now is to **listen, stay calm, write it down, and pass it on to you**, not to investigate. ## A text you can send her now > Thanks for telling me. You handled it right. For now: > 1. Don't push her for more details. Just let her know you're glad she told you and she can talk to you anytime. > 2. Don't promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say "I might need to tell someone whose job is to help keep kids safe." > 3. Write down exactly what she said, word for word, plus the time and who was around. Facts only, no guesses. > 4. Don't contact her family or ask other kids about it. > 5. If you think she's in danger right now or is scared to go home today, tell me immediately or call 911. > > I'll take it from here and let you know next steps. ## What you should do next - **Check for immediate safety.** If anything suggests she's at risk today, call 911 or your local child protective services before she leaves. - **Follow your organization's reporting policy.** Bring in your designated safeguarding or child protection lead if that's someone other than you. - **Know your reporting duty.** In many places, people who work with youth are mandated reporters, and the threshold is *reasonable suspicion*, not proof. "Bad at home" on its own may or may not meet that bar. - **Get advice if you're unsure.** Your local child protective services line can help you decide whether to make a report. In the U.S., the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453) also offers this guidance, 24/7. - **Document your own steps.** Note who you talked to and when. ## For the days ahead - Keep her routine normal and welcoming. - The group leader can check in gently and briefly ("I'm around if you want to talk") without pressing. - Check in with the group leader too. Moments like this can be stressful, and she may have questions or worries of her own. "Bad at home" can mean many things, from a family argument or money stress to something more serious. You don't need to figure out which one it is. You only need to make sure the right people know.

**Text you can send her:** > Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. Here's what to do now: > 1. Stay calm and stay close. Let her know she's not in trouble and you're glad she told you. > 2. Don't push for details. You can say: "You can talk to me anytime. I'm here." > 3. Don't promise to keep it a secret. If she asks, say: "I might need to tell someone whose job is to help keep kids safe." > 4. Write down her exact words, the time, and who was there. Don't add guesses. > 5. If she says she's scared to go home or that someone hurt her, tell me right away, before pickup. > 6. Don't contact her family or talk about this with other staff or parents. > > I'm handling the next steps. Call me if anything changes. **What you do next:** 1. **If she may be in danger right now, or is afraid to go home,** call 911 or your local child protective services before she is picked up. 2. **Follow your organization's child safety or mandated reporting policy.** In many states, after-school staff are mandated reporters. You don't need proof to make a report, only a reasonable concern. When you're unsure, report. 3. **Call your supervisor or designated child safety lead** now, while details are fresh. 4. **If you're unsure whether this is reportable,** call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at **1-800-422-4453** (call or text, 24/7). They can talk it through with you and connect you to your local reporting line. 5. **Keep it private.** Share only with the people who need to know. **What not to do right now:** - Don't question her further or try to find out what's happening at home. - Don't confront or contact her family. - Don't try to solve the bigger situation tonight. **Afterward:** - Document what was said and what you did, with times. - Check in with the group leader within a day or two. Hearing this is hard, and she should have someone to debrief with, such as you or your supervisor. **Numbers:** - Emergency: **911** - Childhelp Hotline: **1-800-422-4453** (call or text) - 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: **call or text 988** (if the child or anyone else is in emotional crisis) - Your supervisor or child safety lead: [number]

# What to tell the group leader Here is a message you can send her now: > Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. Here's what to do: > > 1. **If she seems unsafe right now or scared to go home, tell me immediately.** If anyone is in immediate danger, call 911. > 2. **Stay calm and nearby.** Let her know she can talk to you anytime. Something like: "I'm glad you told me. I'm here if you want to talk more." > 3. **Don't push for details.** No questions about what's happening or who. Let her share only what she chooses. > 4. **Don't promise to keep it secret.** If she asks, say: "I might need to share this with someone whose job is to help keep kids safe." > 5. **Don't mention it to whoever picks her up.** > 6. **Write down her exact words**, plus the time, and what you noticed. No guesses or interpretations. > 7. **Call me before she leaves today.** # What you do next 1. **Check timing.** When is she being picked up? If there's any sign she's in danger at home tonight, call 911 or your local child protective services hotline now. 2. **Follow your organization's child safeguarding policy.** Most staff who work with kids are mandated reporters. The threshold is reasonable suspicion, not proof. If you're unsure whether this meets it, call your supervisor or the hotline below and ask. They can help you decide. 3. **Keep it need-to-know.** Share only with your supervisor or designated safeguarding lead and the people your policy requires. 4. **Don't investigate or contact the family yourself.** That's the job of child protective services. 5. **Debrief with the group leader after today.** This is hard to hold. Check in on her tomorrow, and loop in your supervisor. # Who to call - **Immediate danger:** 911 - **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline:** 1-800-422-4453 (call or text, 24/7). They can advise you on whether and how to report in your state. - **If the child mentions hurting herself:** 988 (call or text) - **Your supervisor or safeguarding lead:** [number] These are U.S. numbers. If you're elsewhere, use your local equivalents.

Here's what I'd tell her. **Right now, with the child** - **Don't push for details.** No probing or leading questions ("Does someone hurt you?"). If the child brings it up again, she can listen and say things like "Thank you for telling me," "I'm glad you said something," and "It's not your fault." - **Don't promise secrecy.** If asked, she can say, "I can't keep this just between us, but I'll only share it with people whose job is to help keep you safe." - **Stay warm and normal.** She should check in casually and make sure the child knows she can come back anytime, without making her feel singled out or in trouble. **Today** 1. **Write it down** while it's fresh: the date and time, the child's exact words in quotes, the context, and what the leader said in response. She should stick to facts and leave out interpretations or guesses. 2. **Report it to the designated safeguarding lead or program director** (that may be you) right away, following your organization's child protection policy. She doesn't need to figure out whether it's "serious enough." That's not her job, and a vague disclosure still counts. 3. **Don't contact the parents or investigate.** If someone at home is the problem, that could make things worse for the child. **For you as the supervisor** - **Check your reporting obligations.** In many places, after-school staff are mandated reporters, and the threshold is often "reasonable suspicion," not proof. "Bad at home" alone may or may not meet it, but consult your child protection policy or call your local child protective services line. Many will let you talk it through and will advise whether it warrants a report. - **Document the consultation**, including who you spoke with and what they advised. - **Keep it confidential.** Only people who need to know should know. - **Watch for patterns** such as changes in behavior, attendance, hunger, injuries, or further comments, and have staff log anything they notice. - **Support the leader.** These moments are stressful, and she did the right thing by speaking up. Let her know that. "Bad at home" could mean many things, such as conflict, a parent's job loss, illness, or something more serious. You don't need to know which. Your role is to pass it to the people trained to assess it. If you tell me your country or state, I can point you to the specific reporting requirements and hotline. If you'd like, I can also draft a short text to send the leader now.

Here's what I'd tell her. **Right now** - **Don't push for details.** No interrogating or probing questions. If the child brings it up again, she should listen calmly. If she needs to ask anything, keep it open-ended: "Can you tell me more about that?" or "I'm glad you told me." - **Reassure the child.** Something like: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. You're not in trouble." Avoid reacting with visible shock or alarm. - **Don't promise secrecy.** If the child asks her not to tell, she can say: "I care about you, and when someone isn't safe or is hurting, I need to get help from people who can do something about it." - **Don't confront or contact the parents.** That can put the child at greater risk and compromise any later investigation. - **Stay warm and normal with the child.** Check in casually, keep the routine, and make sure she knows the leader is a safe person to talk to. **Today** 1. **Write down what happened** while it's fresh: the child's exact words in quotes, the date and time, the context, what the leader said in response, and any observations (demeanor, visible injuries, changes in behavior). Stick to facts, not interpretations. 2. **Report it up the chain.** She should tell you, and you should tell whoever is your designated safeguarding or child protection contact, following your organization's policy. 3. **Decide about a report to child protective services.** Most after-school staff are mandated reporters, and the standard is usually *reasonable suspicion*, not proof. "Bad at home" is vague, so it may not clearly meet that threshold alone, but combined with other concerns (injuries, hunger, fearfulness, previous comments, sudden behavior changes), it might. If you're unsure, call your local child protective services hotline or the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453 in the US). You can describe the situation and ask for guidance without having to be certain. **If there's any sign of immediate danger**, such as the child being afraid to go home, visible injuries, or a disclosure of abuse, call CPS right away, and 911 if she's in imminent danger. **Going forward** - Let the leader know she did the right thing by listening and passing it on. - Keep information limited to those who need to know. - Note any further comments or changes in the child's behavior. Also check your organization's own policy, since reporting procedures and timelines vary by state and employer. If it helps, I can draft a short text for you to send the leader.

Here is what I'd tell her. You can send it nearly as is: --- "Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. Here's what to do: **Right now** - Don't press her for more. Quiet is okay. Let her know the door is open: "I'm glad you told me. You can talk to me anytime." - Keep things normal with her. Same routines, same warmth. - Don't promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say: "I might need to talk to someone whose job is to help keep kids safe." **Today** - Write down her exact words, the date and time, and what was happening just before. Stick to what she said and what you saw. Leave out guesses about what it means. - Don't question her, her family, or other kids about it. - Send me your notes, and I'll look at them with you. We'll follow our child safety policy from here. **If you see or hear anything that suggests she's in immediate danger, call 911, then call me.** You don't have to figure out what "bad at home" means. That's not your job. Your job was to listen, and you did." --- **For you, as her supervisor** - "Bad at home" could mean many things, from a parent losing a job to a safety concern. Don't assume either way, but don't dismiss it. - Check your organization's child protection policy and your state's reporting rules. Most staff who work with children are mandated reporters, and the threshold is usually reasonable suspicion, not proof. A report is not an accusation. It asks trained people to look. - If you're unsure whether this meets the threshold, call your state or local child abuse hotline. You can describe the situation and ask for guidance without it being a formal report. The Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453) can also advise. - Plan a low-key check-in with the child in the next few days, ideally by the adult she trusts most. - Check in with the group leader too. Getting a disclosure like this is hard.

Tell her she did the right thing by listening, and that the next step is to report it, not to investigate. **A text you can send her:** > Thanks for telling me. You did the right thing. Here's what to do: > 1. Don't press her for more. If she brings it up again, listen, stay calm, and say "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did." > 2. Don't promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say "I may need to talk to someone whose job is to help keep kids safe." > 3. Write down today what she said, word for word, with the date, time, and what led up to it. Stick to facts, not guesses. > 4. Tell our designated safeguarding lead (or me) today. Don't wait for the next session. > 5. Don't contact her family about it. We'll follow our child protection policy from here. > 6. If you think she's in immediate danger, call 911. > > Call me anytime if you want to talk it through. **For you:** - "Bad at home" could mean many things, from a parent losing a job or a death in the family to conflict or something more serious. Neither you nor the leader needs to figure out which. That's the job of the people trained to assess it. - Staff and volunteers working with children are usually mandatory reporters, so follow your organization's reporting procedure and your state's requirements. If you aren't sure who the designated contact is, call your state's child protective services line or the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (1-800-422-4453). They can advise on whether and how to report. - Check in with the leader afterward. Moments like this can be hard on the adult who received the disclosure. - Keep the information limited to the people who need it. - At the next session, the leader should treat the girl as she normally would. A warm, steady presence matters, and she doesn't need to be singled out. If you'd like, I can draft a short incident note template for the leader to fill in.

You're handling this well by asking. Here is what to tell her. **Steps for the group leader** 1. **If the child seems to be in immediate danger, or is afraid to go home today, call 911.** 2. **Do not press her for more.** Do not ask detailed questions or push her to explain. If she speaks again, listen calmly. 3. **Stay warm and low-key with her.** Something like: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. I'm here." Do not promise to keep it secret. 4. **Write down what happened as soon as she can.** Include the date, time, the child's exact words ("things are bad at home"), what the leader said, and what she saw. Use facts only, no guesses. 5. **Report it today.** Tell your supervisor or designated child safety contact right away, and follow your organization's reporting policy. Most after-school staff are mandated reporters, which means a report is required when there is reasonable concern. She does not need proof or details first. 6. **Share it only with the people who need to know.** Do not discuss it with other staff, other children, or parents. **What not to do right now** - Do not question the child further or investigate. - Do not contact her parents or caregivers about what she said. - Do not try to work out what is happening at home. **A message you can send the leader** > Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. Please write down exactly what she said and when, in her words. Don't ask her more questions. Be kind and steady with her. I'm calling [supervisor/safety contact] now, and we'll make the report together today. If you think she's in danger tonight, call 911. I'm here if you want to talk. **Who to call** - Immediate danger: **911** - Child abuse and neglect guidance, 24/7: **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline, 1-800-422-4453** (call or text). They can talk through whether and how to report. - Your state or county child protective services reporting line, per your policy: [number] - If the leader is shaken up: **988** (call or text), or text HOME to **741741** **After** Check in with the leader later today or tomorrow. A moment like this can be hard to carry. Plan a short debrief with your supervisor, and keep the written notes somewhere private.

Here is what to tell her. Keep it short and calm. **For the leader, right now** 1. If the child says she is afraid to go home tonight, or you think she is in immediate danger, call 911. 2. Stay warm and steady. Do not press her for more. You can say: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. I'm here if you want to talk more." 3. Do not promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say: "I may need to talk to someone whose job is to help keep kids safe." 4. Do not question her about details, and do not contact her parents or anyone at home. 5. Write down what happened while it is fresh. Include her exact words ("bad at home"), the date and time, where it happened, and who was nearby. Stick to facts. Leave out guesses. 6. Tell the program supervisor or designated safety contact today, before the leader goes home. 7. Follow your organization's child safety and reporting policy. Staff in youth programs are often mandated reporters, and the legal threshold is usually reasonable concern, not proof. If you are unsure, call your local child protective services or the Childhelp hotline and describe what she said. They can help decide whether to make a report. **What not to do tonight** - Do not try to figure out what is happening at home. - Do not confront anyone. - Do not share this with other staff or families beyond those who need to know. **For you, as the person supporting her** - Tell her she did the right thing by coming to you. - Set up a time to debrief once the report or consult is done. - Confirm that she knows who to go to if she is upset after. **Numbers to keep handy** - Emergency: 911 - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-422-4453 (call or text) - 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988, for the leader if she is shaken - Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 Reporting rules and local CPS numbers vary by state, so check yours before you call. **A text you can send her** "You did the right thing by listening. Don't ask her more questions. Write down exactly what she said and when. Then come find me or [supervisor name] today. If she says she's afraid to go home, call 911. I'm here."

Tell her something like this—copy/paste and adjust names: > Thanks for telling me right away—you did the right thing. Please do these now: > 1. Stay calm and warm with her. Keep her supervised in a visible area; don’t leave her alone. > 2. Don’t interview her or ask for details. You can ask only: “Are you safe right now?” If she says no, or says she’s afraid to go home, has injuries, or mentions harm, call me immediately and follow emergency protocol/911. > 3. Say something like: “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you did. You’re not in trouble. I can’t keep this a secret, but I’ll only share it with people whose job is to help keep kids safe.” > 4. Don’t promise secrecy or say “everything will be fine.” Don’t call her parents yet—we need guidance first. > 5. Write down her exact words, time, location, what she did after, and who was present. Send that to me. > 6. I’ll notify our designated child-protection lead and make the required report/consult now. Keep this confidential—need-to-know only. > Call me after you’ve done 1–5. Key message to the leader: **her job is not to investigate. Her job is to listen, keep the child safe, document exact facts, and report immediately.** If there is any immediate danger, she should call 911/emergency services and you right away.

Call the leader back now if you can. Tell her: **“Thank you for telling me right away. Please don’t question her further, don’t promise secrecy, and don’t contact the family about this. Stay near her and keep her supervised. Say only: ‘Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. I’m glad you told me. My job is to help keep you safe. I’m going to tell [supervisor/designated lead] so we can get the right help. Do you feel safe right now?’ If she says no or there’s any immediate danger, call 911, keep her with you, and call me immediately. Write down her exact words—‘bad at home’—plus the time, place, and what happened next. Don’t ask ‘what happened?’ or ‘who did it?’ If she gets quiet, say: ‘You don’t have to tell me more right now. If you want to talk later, I’m here.’ Then notify me and follow our child protection/mandated reporting policy. I’ll contact [designated child protection lead] now; if you’re a mandated reporter, you may need to make the report yourself—I’ll help you confirm. Keep this confidential.”** Key points for the leader: - **Listen, reassure, don’t investigate.** - **Ask only about immediate safety**—“Do you feel safe right now?” - **Do not promise confidentiality.** - **Document exact words and behavior.** - **Notify you/designated lead immediately.** - **If immediate danger: 911, stay with child, don’t release to parent if unsafe per policy/emergency direction.** - **Follow mandated reporting law/program policy**—reasonable suspicion, not proof, is the threshold. - **Don’t confront or call parents yourself.** - **Debrief/support the leader afterward.** If pickup is imminent and the leader is worried about sending her home, tell her to call you **before release** and follow your program’s safety policy—don’t physically restrain, but don’t handle it alone.

She did the right thing by telling you, and the right thing now is to move it through your protocol today — not to figure it out alone. Here's what to tell her, in order: **1. Thank her, and tell her she handled it well.** A child chose her to say that to. That matters. Say so plainly. **2. Tell her not to investigate.** No follow-up questions about who, what, or when. No "are you safe?" interrogation. If the child brings it up again, she can say: *"I'm glad you told me. You can talk to me anytime. I'm going to get you some help with this."* Open, warm, no pressure. The child went quiet — that's a signal to leave the door open, not to push through it. **3. Tell her not to promise secrecy.** If she already did, she can gently correct it: *"I want to be honest with you — I may need to tell someone who can help."* Better a small correction now than a broken promise later. **4. Tell her to write down exactly what was said — today.** Her words, the child's words in quotes ("bad at home"), the date, the time, who else was present. Facts only. No guesses about what's happening at home. "Bad at home" could mean a lot of things — a parent's illness, a fight, money trouble, housing, or harm. She doesn't know, and the notes shouldn't pretend she does. **5. Tell her who to call, and by when.** Name the person — your child protection lead, supervisor, or designated reporter — and say "before you leave today." If your staff are mandated reporters under state law, the report goes through that channel, not around it. The decision to contact child protective services is made by your designated lead under your written policy, not by the group leader on her own. But it doesn't wait until tomorrow. **6. Tell her not to contact the family about this.** Not a call, not a note home, not a casual mention at pickup. If the concern involves someone in the home, that contact could put the child at risk. Any family conversation goes through your lead. **7. Tell her to keep being the same person with the child.** Same greeting, same spot in the room, same warmth. No hovering, no worried face. Consistency is the thing that helps most right now. **8. Check on her.** Hearing that from a kid stays with you. Ask how she's doing, and mean it. One more thing for you: confirm your organization's written reporting policy and your state's mandated reporter requirements before you talk to her, so the name and the deadline you give her are correct. I'm not able to give legal advice, and the specifics vary by state. If it helps, I can draft the short message you send her — the steps above, in your voice, ready to text.

## First: tell her she did the right thing A child chose her as the person to say it to. That matters, and the leader is probably rattled. Lead with that before anything else. ## What she should say to the child Short, calm, honest. Something close to: > "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. I'm going to get help from people whose job is to keep kids safe. You didn't do anything wrong." If the child asks whether she'll tell anyone, she should be honest: *"I have to tell someone who can help. I'll tell as few people as I can."* She should not promise secrecy, and if she already did, she needs to walk it back gently rather than let the child find out later. She should not push for more. Going quiet is not refusal — it's a child deciding how much is safe to say. Silence is allowed. ## What she should not do - **Don't ask for details.** No "who did it," "what happened," "show me." Leading questions can compromise an investigation and force the child to tell the story repeatedly. - **Don't investigate.** She's not the fact-finder. Her job ended at listening. - **Don't contact the family.** Not yet. If the concern involves someone in the home, a call can put the child at risk and undercut the report. This is the most common mistake organizations make. - **Don't discuss it with other staff** beyond the people who need to know. ## What she should write down today In the child's own words, in quotes, with the date and time. What was said, what she said back, and the fact that the child went quiet. No interpretation, no adjectives about the family. Her notes may be read by someone else later. ## What you do 1. **Confirm your reporting obligation today.** Staff in after-school programs are usually mandated reporters. Check your state's rule and your own policy — don't let this sit overnight. 2. **Make the report yourself, or sit with her while she makes it.** Don't hand a shaken staff member a phone number and walk away. 3. **Keep it need-to-know.** You, her, whoever your policy names. Nobody else. 4. **Don't call the family** until you've talked to the agency handling the report or your legal counsel. They'll tell you what contact is safe and when. ## What to tell her about the next few days Keep the routine normal. A quiet check-in — "I'm glad you're here today" — is enough. No extra attention that marks the child out in front of the group. The door stays open if she wants to say more. ## And check on her Ask how she's doing, not just how the report went. Give her the script in writing so she isn't reconstructing it from memory. Tell her she doesn't have to carry this alone, and mean it.

Here's something you can send her as-is. It's written to be read on a phone by someone who's rattled. --- Thank you for telling me right away. You did the right thing, and you don't have to figure out the next part alone. **Right now, and next time you see her** 1. Don't go back and ask her more questions. Don't try to find out what's happening at home. It's not your job to investigate, and repeated questions can make things harder for her. 2. If she brings it up again, just listen. You can say: "Thank you for telling me. You're not in trouble, and you didn't do anything wrong." 3. Don't promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say something true and simple: "I'm going to get help from people whose job is to keep kids safe, and I'll stay with you while that happens." 4. Write down what she said today, while it's fresh. Her exact words in quotation marks, plus the date, time, and where you were. Write only what she said and did, not what you think it means. **Today** 5. Call me before you go home. Don't wait until tomorrow. 6. Don't contact her family, and don't ask her about home again in the program. Let me and my supervisor decide what happens next — reaching out too early can put her at more risk. 7. Keep this between you and me for now. Don't discuss it with other staff, volunteers, or parents. **What happens next** You and I will talk today. Staff in a program like ours are usually mandated reporters, so this likely gets reported to child protective services, and I'll do that with you or for you. That's a normal, required step, not a sign you did something wrong. **If she ever tells you she's in danger right now, or you believe she is — call 911.** Don't wait to call me first. **Then take care of yourself.** Hearing something like this stays with you. Call or text me tonight, and we'll set up a time to talk it through properly. If you're struggling after, you can call or text 988 any time. **Numbers to keep handy** - Emergency: **911** - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: **1-800-422-4453** (call or text) - 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: call or text **988** - Me: [your number] --- Two things for you, not for her: document the call when it happens, and check that your mandated-reporter training and CPS reporting procedure are current before you speak with her.

**Tell her this, tonight.** 1. **Stay calm with the child.** If the child is still with her, thank her for telling, say she did the right thing, and that it's the leader's job to help keep her safe. No promise of secrecy. No promise about what happens next. Don't ask more questions — "bad at home" is enough to act on. 2. **Write it down now, word for word.** As soon as another staff member can sit with the child, she should type or write what the child said, using the child's exact words. Include the time, the room, who else was present, and what the child did after (went quiet, withdrew). Her memory of the wording fades within hours. 3. **Check for immediate danger.** Signs of injury, fear of going home today, a stated threat, or a child who can't safely be released at pickup: call 911. 4. **Call you tonight**, not in the morning. She should not carry this alone or wait to see how she feels. 5. **Keep the circle small.** No discussion with other parents, other kids, or staff who don't need to know. No posting, no group chat. **What you do next.** 6. **Report it.** In most U.S. states, after-school staff are mandated reporters and the report goes to child protective services directly, usually within 24 hours and immediately if there's imminent risk. Confirm your state's hotline and deadline with your child safety lead or legal contact, and make the call tonight or first thing. Your internal notification doesn't substitute for the statutory report. 7. **Don't contact the family first.** If the concern involves someone in the home, a call from the program can increase danger and can compromise the investigation. Let the reporting agency decide. 8. **Keep tomorrow ordinary for the child.** Same routine, same warmth, no interrogation. If she brings it up, the leader listens, says thank you for telling me, and writes it down. 9. **Check on the leader.** Hearing this is hard. Offer to sit with her while she writes her notes, tell her about EAP, and let her know she's not expected to assess or fix anything — reporting is the job. **What not to do right now:** don't investigate, don't interview the child again, don't promise it will be okay or that she won't get in trouble, don't talk to the family, and don't wait until the next shift to document. **Numbers** - Emergency: **911** - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: **1-800-422-4453** (call or text) — for guidance on reporting - Your state's child abuse hotline: confirm the number and the reporting deadline today - Staff support: **988** (call or text) You're not a clinician and neither is she — the goal tonight is safety, an accurate record, and a report.

Tell your group leader to take a deep breath. She did the right thing by reaching out to you. Here is what you should tell her to do **right now**, followed by what you and your organization need to do next. --- ### 1. What to tell the leader to do *right now* **A. Do not interrogate or push the child to talk** Tell the leader **not** to ask leading questions like *"Is someone hurting you?"* or *"What did your parents do?"* Pushing can make the child shut down further, feel scared, or unintentionally taint any potential investigation. **B. Give a calm, validating response** The leader should say something simple, warm, and low-pressure. Give her these exact words: > *"Thank you for telling me that. I'm really glad you shared that with me. You aren't in any trouble, and you're safe here. We don't have to talk about it right now, but I'm right here if you want to."* **C. Never promise secrecy** If the child says, *"Don't tell anyone,"* the leader should **not** say *"I promise."* Instead, she should say: > *"I will always do what I need to do to keep you safe."* **D. Keep the child close and comfortable** * Give the child an "out" that allows her to be near the leader without having to talk (e.g., offering to let her help set up a game, color, or read a book nearby). * Keep an eye on her behavior for the rest of the day (is she withdrawn, crying, anxious about going home?). --- ### 2. Immediate Documentation (As soon as she has 2 minutes) Tell the leader to write down an **exact, objective record** while it is fresh in her mind: * **Date and exact time** of the comment. * **Exact words:** Write down *verbatim* what the child said (*"Things are bad at home"*) and what the leader said in response. * **Physical observations:** What was the child doing? (e.g., looking at the floor, crossed arms, teary-eyed). * **No opinions or assumptions:** She should write *“Child stated 'things are bad at home'”*, NOT *“Child is being abused at home.”* --- ### 3. What YOU (Leadership) need to do next * **DO NOT call the parents yet:** If there is abuse, domestic violence, or neglect occurring, tipping off the parents before consulting professionals can put the child in serious danger. * **Assess Mandated Reporter status:** As after-school staff, you and your team are almost certainly **mandated reporters**. While "things are bad at home" is vague, it is an open door to potential harm. * **Follow your internal protocol:** Notify your site director, designated safeguarding lead, or organization's social worker immediately. * **Pickup protocol:** Pay very close attention to pickup today. Note who picks her up, the child’s reaction to that person, and the caregiver's demeanor. * **Consult Child Protective Services (CPS/DCFS) if needed:** If the child discloses anything specific before pickup, or if there is already an existing file/suspicion regarding this family, call your local child protection intake line. You can call them to consult: *"A child said this, here is what we observed, does this meet your threshold for an intake report?"*

Here is what you should tell the group leader immediately. ### 1. Give her this quick script to text back right now: Tell her to keep it low-pressure, supportive, and **not** to interrogate the child: > **"Tell her: 'Thank you for telling me that. You’re safe here, and I'm really glad you shared that with me. You don’t have to talk right now, but I’m here whenever you’re ready.' Then, let her engage in a quiet activity (coloring, drawing, reading) near the leader so she feels supported without feeling put on the spot."** --- ### 2. Remind the leader of these crucial rules: * **DO NOT press for details or ask leading questions.** Staff should not investigate (e.g., don't ask: *"Is someone hurting you?"* or *"Did your parents fight?"*). Let the child speak on her own terms. * **DO NOT promise secrecy.** If the child says, *"Promise you won't tell,"* the leader should say: *"I care about you, and my job is to make sure you're safe. I won't share this with other kids, but I might need to tell someone whose job it is to help."* * **DO NOT react with shock or pity.** Keep body language calm, neutral, and warm. --- ### 3. What the leader needs to do next (Documentation): Ask the leader to write down an **exact factual record** as soon as she has a free moment: * The exact words the child used (verbatim quotes). * What was happening right before the child said it. * The child’s demeanor/body language (e.g., looked down, started crying, clutched their stomach). * The date and exact time. --- ### 4. What YOU should do next as the supervisor: 1. **Go relieve the leader or check in in person** if you are on-site, so the leader has a moment to debrief with you out of earshot of the kids. 2. **Observe the child:** Keep an eye out for signs of distress, withdrawal, unusual clinginess, or physical marks. 3. **Review your Mandated Reporter / Program Policy:** A vague statement like "things are bad at home" isn't automatic grounds for a child welfare report on its own, but it is a **red flag**. If the child discloses abuse, neglect, or immediate danger later, follow your state’s mandated reporting laws immediately. 4. **Decide on pickup protocol:** Be present at dismissal. Observe who picks the child up and how the child reacts to them. Do not confront the parent at this stage unless you have confirmed a specific safety plan/protocol.

Here is a clear, step-by-step response you can send or adapt for the group leader right now: *** **1. Stay present and do not press for details** * Tell the leader not to force the child to explain further. Pushing can make a child shut down or feel unsafe. * The leader can say something simple and supportive: *"Thank you for telling me. You don’t have to talk right now if you don’t want to, but I’m here whenever you need me."* * Let the child return to the regular activity whenever she is ready. **2. Do not promise absolute secrecy** * If the child starts talking again, the leader must not promise to keep things secret. * A gentle, honest boundary works best: *"I care about you, and I want to make sure you are safe. If you tell me something that means you might be in danger, I may need to get help from someone whose job is to keep kids safe."* **3. Write down exact words immediately** * As soon as the leader has a moment, have her write down: * The exact words the child used (verbatim quotes, like "bad at home"). * The time, location, and activity underway when it happened. * The child’s observable behavior (e.g., "became quiet, looked down, resumed drawing"). * Emphasize: write down facts and observations only, not guesses or interpretations. **4. Check in with leadership at pickup** * Ask the leader to meet with you (or the designated site supervisor) before the end of the shift today to review what was noted. * Together, assess next steps according to your program’s child protection policy and local mandatory reporting requirements.

Here is what to text or tell the group leader right now: ### 1. In the moment with the child * **Acknowledge and thank them plainly:** "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you shared that with me." * **Do not press for details:** If she does not want to say more right now, do not push or interrogate. Say: "You don't have to say anything else right now if you don't want to. I'm here whenever you want to talk." * **Do not promise total secrecy:** Do not say "I won't tell anyone." If asked, say: "I want to make sure you're safe and supported, so I might need to talk to someone whose job it is to help us figure that out." * **Re-engage gently:** Let her return to the group activity or offer a quiet choice (drawing, reading, sitting nearby) so she feels secure and not singled out. --- ### 2. Immediately after the conversation * **Write down exact words:** Have the leader write down the exact words the child said, the context, the time, and any specific behaviors, without adding interpretations or guesses. * **Keep it factual:** Record only what was seen and heard (e.g., "Child stated: 'Things are bad at home.' When asked if she wanted to say more, she looked down and remained quiet for two minutes before joining the art table."). --- ### 3. Next steps for your program * **Follow your mandated reporting and organizational protocols:** Check in directly with your program director, designated safeguarding lead, or site coordinator immediately to determine whether a report or formal safety assessment is required under local law and policy. * **Support the leader:** Reassure the staff member that they handled the moment well by listening, not pressing, and reporting it up right away.

### Immediate Steps for the Leader Right Now 1. **Stay calm and present.** Tell the child: "Thank you for telling me. You are safe here, and you don't have to talk more right now if you don't want to." 2. **Do not press for details.** Let the child stay near the leader or rejoin an activity at their own pace. Do not interrogate or push for an explanation. 3. **Keep the child supervised.** Ensure the child remains in sight and supported for the rest of the program time. 4. **Do not promise absolute secrecy.** If the child asks the leader not to tell anyone, the leader can say: "I care about you, and my job is to make sure you are safe. That means I might need to ask someone whose job it is to help." --- ### What Not to Do Right Now - **Do not investigate.** Staff members should not question the child, contact the family, or try to figure out what happened at home. - **Do not promise you won't tell anyone.** Staff are mandatory reporters; promising secrecy creates distress when outside help is required. - **Do not display shock or distress.** Keep reactions steady and neutral so the child does not feel they did something wrong by speaking up. --- ### Next Steps for You and the Leader 1. **Check in immediately after program:** Have the leader write down the child’s exact words, the time, and any context while it is fresh. Use only the child's direct quotes without assumptions. 2. **Follow your organization’s reporting policy:** Contact your designated safeguarding lead, program director, or supervisor immediately. 3. **Follow mandated reporter requirements:** If staff are mandated reporters and there is suspected abuse or neglect, follow your state or local protocol to notify the child protection intake line or law enforcement. --- ### Who to Contact and Resources - **Immediate Physical Danger:** Call **911**. - **Child Abuse & Neglect Support/Consultation:** - **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline:** Call or text **1-800-422-4453** (free, confidential, 24/7 support for mandatory reporting questions and crisis intervention). - **Crisis Support:** - **988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline:** Call or text **988**. - **Crisis Text Line:** Text **HOME to 741741**. Document the facts plainly and confidentially once everyone is safe.

Here is what to tell your group leader right now: ### Immediate steps for the leader 1. **Stay calm and present.** Reassure the child without pressing for details. A simple, supportive statement is enough: *"Thank you for telling me. You’re safe here, and I’m glad you shared that."* 2. **Do not interrogate or press for more information.** Let the child stay quiet or return to the activity if they want to. Do not ask leading questions like *"Is someone hurting you?"* or demand an explanation. 3. **Do not promise secrecy.** If the child asks not to tell anyone, gently say: *"I care about you, and my job is to make sure you are safe. That means I might need to talk to someone whose job it is to help."* 4. **Keep the child in sight and supported.** Allow them to participate, sit quietly, or do a low-pressure activity nearby. Keep normal routines in place for the rest of the group. --- ### What you and the leader need to do next 1. **Connect immediately after program hours.** Have the leader write down the child’s exact words, demeanor, time of day, and any observable details while memory is fresh. Stick strictly to facts—what was said and seen—without guessing or diagnosing. 2. **Follow your organization's mandatory reporting protocol.** If you or your staff are mandated reporters and there is reasonable cause to suspect abuse or neglect, follow your state and organizational procedures immediately. Contact your designated supervisor or child protection liaison. 3. **Protect the child's privacy.** Do not discuss what the child said with other staff members, volunteers, or other parents who do not need to know. --- ### What not to do right now * Do not call the parents or guardians to ask about the statement before consulting your supervisor or child welfare protocol. * Do not attempt to investigate, verify, or resolve the home situation yourself. * Do not make promises to the child about what will happen next. --- ### Emergency and Support Resources * **Immediate danger / emergency:** Call **911** * **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline:** Call or text **1-800-422-4453** (24/7, confidential professional crisis counselors) * **Suicide & Crisis Lifeline:** Call or text **988** * **Crisis Text Line:** Text **HOME** to **741741**

You can copy and paste this exact message to your group leader right now: > **"Thank you for telling me immediately. Please do not press her for details or ask leading questions. Just validate her feelings and keep her comfortable. You can say something like: *'Thank you for telling me. I'm really glad you're here today, and you are safe here. If you want to talk more later, I'm here to listen.'* Keep a close eye on her, let her participate in normal activities if she wants to, and I will come support you shortly."** *** Once you have sent that text, here is how you and the leader should handle the next steps: ### 1. How to Handle the Child Right Now * **Do not interrogate:** If the child is a victim of abuse or neglect, asking leading questions (e.g., *"Did someone hit you?"* or *"Are your parents fighting?"*) can accidentally contaminate a future investigation by Child Protective Services (CPS) or law enforcement. * **Use open-ended, low-pressure prompts (only if she wants to talk):** If the child approaches the leader again to talk, the leader should only use open-ended phrases like, *"Tell me more about that,"* or *"What do you mean by 'bad'?"* * **Maintain normalcy:** Kids often disclose heavy things and then immediately want to go back to playing because they feel overwhelmed or vulnerable. Let her set the pace. ### 2. Document Everything Immediately Instruct the group leader to write down the interaction as soon as she has a quiet moment, while it is still fresh in her mind. It needs to be entirely factual, not speculative: * **Exact quotes:** What did the child say word-for-word? * **Context:** What was happening right before she said it? (e.g., Were they talking about going home? Was it snack time?) * **Demeanor:** How was the child acting? (e.g., crying, avoiding eye contact, trembling, or completely flat). ### 3. Assess for Immediate Safety (Before Pickup) You need to determine if the child is safe to go home today. * Go down to the room yourself to casually observe the child and check in with the leader. * If the child opens up further and discloses physical abuse, sexual abuse, domestic violence, or says *"I am scared to go home today,"* **you must contact your local CPS/Department of Family Services hotline immediately**, before dismissal, to get their guidance on whether to release the child to the parents. ### 4. Fulfill Mandated Reporter Duties As after-school program staff, you and your leader are almost certainly **Mandated Reporters** under state law. * **"Bad at home" is vague:** It could mean abuse, or it could mean a pet died, parents are divorcing, or she was grounded. * **When in doubt, call:** You do not need *proof* of abuse to call CPS; you only need "reasonable suspicion." You can call your state's child abuse hotline, explain the exact situation (the vague comment and the sudden withdrawal), and let the intake worker decide if it meets the threshold for a formal report, or if you should just monitor the child closely over the next few days. *** **How would you like to proceed?** If you let me know **what state/country you are in** or **the approximate age of the child**, I can provide your specific state reporting guidelines, or give you age-appropriate ways for you to gently check in with the child yourself before pickup today.

Because this situation involves the potential safety of a child and your organization's legal obligations as mandated reporters, the immediate response needs to be handled carefully. Here is what you can text the group leader right now, followed by the steps you need to take as the supervisor. ### 1. What to text the group leader immediately: Send a clear, calming message so the leader doesn't panic or accidentally mishandle the disclosure. > *"Thank you for telling me right away. For right now, do not press her for details or ask leading questions. Just let her know you are glad she told you, keep her near you so she feels safe, and let her return to a normal activity if she wants to. I am coming over now [or: I am calling you in 2 minutes] to help handle the next steps."* ### 2. Immediate Guidance for the Group Leader Once you connect with the leader, make sure they understand these standard child-safety boundaries: * **Validate and reassure:** The leader should simply offer a supportive presence. Saying something simple like, *"Thank you for sharing that with me, I'm here for you,"* is enough. * **Do not interrogate:** Staff should never "investigate" or ask leading questions (e.g., *"Did someone hit you?"*). If the child wants to talk more on her own, the leader should just listen and use open-ended prompts like, *"Do you want to tell me more about that?"* * **No promises of secrecy:** Ensure the leader does not promise the child that they will "keep it a secret," as you may be legally required to report it. * **Observe:** Have the leader quietly note the child’s demeanor, physical appearance, and emotional state. ### 3. Your Next Steps as the Supervisor * **Check on the child before dismissal:** Depending on how much time is left in the program today, you (or your program's designated safeguarding lead/counselor) may want to gently check in with the child in a quiet, comfortable space to see if she is willing to share what "bad" means, or if she feels safe going home today. * **Document everything immediately:** Have the group leader write down the exact words the child used, the context of what was happening right before she said it, the time, and the child's demeanor. Keep the documentation strictly factual, avoiding assumptions or opinions. * **Follow your organization’s Mandated Reporter protocol:** A vague statement like "things are bad at home" could mean anything from parents arguing or a pet being sick, to serious neglect or abuse. Review your program's specific policies, consult with your director or legal/HR team if applicable, and contact your state or local Child Protective Services (CPS) hotline. You do not need proof of abuse to call CPS; you can even call them to consult on a vague disclosure to see if it meets the threshold for a formal report, or to check if the family already has an open case. *** **How would you like to proceed?** If it would be helpful, I can provide: 1. A framework of open-ended, non-leading questions you can use to gently check in with the child before pickup time. 2. A template for documenting the incident objectively for your files. 3. National helpline numbers (like the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline) where you can get immediate, professional consultation on whether this requires a CPS report.

Tell your group leader to stay calm, stay present, and not press the child for details right now. Here is a text you can copy and send to the leader right away, followed by the next steps for you as the supervisor. ### What to text the group leader right now > "Thank you for telling me right away. Please don't press her for more details or ask leading questions—just let her know you're glad she told you and that she's safe here. Stay near her and let her join the regular activity if she wants to, or sit quietly if she needs space. Right after she leaves, write down her exact words and what was happening right before she said it. Call me as soon as dismissal is done so we can go over our reporting steps together." --- ### Guidance to give the leader when you talk **1. What to do in the moment** * **Validate without prying:** The leader can quietly say something simple like, "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you're here today, and I'm around if you want to talk more later." * **Do not investigate:** Staff should never interview a child or ask probing questions (like "Did someone hurt you?"). If the child chooses to share more on her own, the leader should just listen and use open, neutral prompts like, "Tell me more about that." * **Keep the routine normal:** Let the child set the pace for the rest of the afternoon. Normal routines help kids feel safe and in control. * **Do not promise to keep a secret:** If the child asks the leader not to tell anyone, the leader should be honest: "I care about you, so if I'm worried about your safety, I have to get help from people whose job it is to keep kids safe." **2. How to document it** * Have the leader write down the child's exact words ("things are bad at home"), the time, what the group was doing when she said it, and her demeanor before and after. * Stick strictly to what was seen and heard, not assumptions about what might be happening. **3. Next steps for you and the leader** * **Check your organization's policy:** Pull up your program's child safety and mandated reporting protocol. * **Consult your state's child protection hotline:** A vague statement like "things are bad at home" can mean many things—from a family argument or financial stress to unsafe living conditions. In most states, after-school staff are mandated reporters. If you are unsure whether this statement meets the threshold for a report, you can call your local child protective services hotline to consult with an intake worker, share what you have, and follow their guidance. * **Ensure safe pickup:** Make sure you or another supervisor are present at dismissal today to observe pickup and support the group leader.

Text your group leader back right away with clear, calm steps for the next few minutes, and let her know how you will follow up together after the program ends. **What you can text her right now:** > "Thank you for telling me right away. For now, just thank her for trusting you and let her know she doesn't have to talk more unless she wants to. Don't press her for details. Keep things normal for the rest of the afternoon and stay close so she knows you're there. Let's check in as soon as pick-up is over to talk through next steps." --- **What your group leader should do in the moment:** 1. **Thank the child and remove the pressure.** She can say something simple and quiet, like: *"Thank you for telling me that. You don't have to say anything else right now, and you aren't in trouble. I'm really glad you're here today."* 2. **Do not ask probing questions.** Avoid asking *what* is bad or *who* is involved. If this turns out to be a situation that requires a child protective services report, trained investigators need to ask those questions. Pressing a child can also cause them to shut down or feel overwhelmed. 3. **Keep the routine normal.** Let the child go back to the activity, get a snack, or sit quietly near the leader. Predictability helps kids feel safe after sharing something heavy. 4. **Listen if she chooses to say more.** If the child brings it up again on her own, the leader should just listen calmly, nod, and repeat back simple encouragement (*"I hear you," "That sounds really hard"*). --- **What the two of you should do next (before dismissal and immediately after):** 1. **Watch pick-up closely.** If you can, go to the site before dismissal to support your staff member. Watch the child's body language when her parent or guardian arrives. If she seems terrified to leave, or if the adult picking her up appears unsafe (for example, visibly intoxicated or aggressive), follow your organization's emergency safety protocol rather than releasing her. 2. **Write down the exact words.** As soon as the children leave, have the group leader write down exactly what the child said, word for word, along with the time, what was happening right before she said it, and her demeanor. Stick to facts, not guesses. 3. **Follow your mandated reporter and organizational policies.** Review what you know against your state's mandated reporting laws and your organization's child safety policy. "Things are bad at home" can mean many things—from a parent losing a job or a family argument, to divorce, to abuse or neglect. * If you aren't sure whether this meets the threshold for a report, **you can call your state's child abuse hotline or your organization's designated safeguarding lead to consult.** You do not have to be certain abuse is happening to ask for guidance from the hotline. 4. **Support your group leader.** Having a child share something like this is stressful. Let your leader know she handled it well by reaching out to you immediately, and make sure she knows she doesn't have to carry this alone.

Here is what to tell the group leader right now. You can copy and paste the first section directly to her. ### Immediate Steps for the Group Leader 1. **Stay calm and keep a normal routine.** Let the child stay in a safe, comfortable area with a quiet activity. 2. **Validate without pressing.** Say something simple like, "Thank you for telling me. You are not in trouble, and I am glad you are here today." 3. **Let the child lead.** Stay nearby so she isn't alone, and let her know she can talk more if she wants to, or just sit quietly. 4. **Call me when the other kids are settled.** We will handle the next steps together. ### Who to Call * **Immediate danger:** Call **911** if the child has visible injuries needing urgent care or if you believe she is in immediate physical danger leaving the program today. * **Supervisor / Safeguarding Lead:** Have the leader call you or your organization's designated safeguarding lead as soon as she has a moment away from the group. * **Child Protective Services / Childhelp:** Call your state's child abuse reporting line, or call/text the **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453** for guidance on mandated reporting steps. * **Crisis Support:** **988** (call or text) or **Crisis Text Line** (text HOME to **741741**). ### What Not to Do Right Now * **Do not interrogate or investigate.** Tell the leader not to ask leading questions or press for details. Investigating is the job of trained child protection professionals. * **Do not promise to keep a secret.** If the child asks the leader not to tell anyone, the leader should say gently, "I care about you, and my job is to help keep you safe. I may need to share this with people whose job is to help." * **Do not contact the parents or guardians yet.** If there is potential abuse or unsafe conditions at home, contacting the family before speaking with your safeguarding lead or Child Protective Services can put the child at greater risk. * **Do not discuss this in front of other children or staff.** Protect the child's privacy. ### Documentation and Debriefing * **Document the facts.** Once the child is safe and the shift allows, have the group leader write down the child's exact words ("bad at home"), the date and time, and any relevant observations (behavior, demeanor). Keep this record factual and store it securely according to your organization's privacy policy. * **Follow your mandated reporter protocol.** Review the situation together with your safeguarding lead or Childhelp (1-800-422-4453) to determine if a formal report is required before dismissal. * **Debrief with the group leader.** Receiving a disclosure is stressful. Check in with the leader after the program ends today to make sure she is supported. *** **Key Numbers to Keep Handy:** * **Emergency:** 911 * **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline:** Call or text 1-800-422-4453 (chat at childhelphotline.org) * **Suicide & Crisis Lifeline:** Call or text 988 (chat at 988lifeline.org) * **Crisis Text Line:** Text HOME to 741741

You are handling this the right way by pausing to get clear steps. Send these instructions to your group leader right now. ### 1. Immediate Steps for the Group Leader 1. **If the child is in immediate physical danger, call 911.** 2. **Stay calm and stay with the child.** Keep a steady, normal tone of voice. 3. **Thank the child for speaking up.** Say something simple like: "Thank you for telling me. I am glad you are here today, and you are not in trouble." 4. **Give the child a choice.** Ask what they would like to do next, such as getting a drink of water, sitting quietly, or rejoining the group activity. 5. **Call the on-call supervisor** at [Insert Supervisor Phone Number] as soon as the child is settled so you have support for the rest of the shift and pickup time. ### 2. What Not to Do Right Now * **Do not press for details or ask leading questions.** Do not ask "Did someone hurt you?" or try to investigate. If a report is needed, trained investigators must ask those questions. * **Do not promise to keep a secret.** If the child asks you not to tell anyone, say: "My job is to help keep you safe, so I may need to share this with people whose job is to help." * **Do not try to solve the home situation today.** Do not confront the parents or caregivers at pickup unless a supervisor or safety protocol directs you to do so. * **Do not share this with other staff or volunteers.** Protect the child's privacy and only discuss this with the designated supervisor. ### 3. Who to Call * **Immediate physical danger or unsafe pickup:** Call **911**. * **On-Call Supervisor / Program Director:** [Insert Phone Number] * **Child Protective Services / Mandated Reporting Hotline:** [Insert State/Local CPS Hotline Number] or call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at **1-800-422-4453** (call or text) for guidance on reporting. * **Crisis Support:** **988** Suicide & Crisis Lifeline (call, text, or chat at 988lifeline.org) or the **Crisis Text Line** (text HOME to **741741**). ### 4. Document and Debrief Afterward * **Document the disclosure.** Once the child is safe and the shift is covered, write down the child's exact words ("bad at home"), the date, the time, and what was observed. Stick strictly to the facts. * **Review mandated reporting steps.** Work together as supervisor and group leader to determine if a mandated report is required under your state laws and organizational policy. * **Debrief together.** Check in with the group leader before they go home today to review the next steps and make sure they have support after handling a difficult moment. *** **Key Numbers (Repeated for Quick Reference)** * **Emergency:** 911 * **On-Call Supervisor:** [Insert Phone Number] * **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline:** 1-800-422-4453 (call or text) * **Suicide & Crisis Lifeline:** 988 (call or text) * **Crisis Text Line:** Text HOME to 741741

***Disclaimer:** I am an AI, not a legal or licensed child welfare professional. You should immediately consult your organization’s written safeguarding policy and your designated Safeguarding Lead or Director.* In a situation like this, the goal is to balance the need to protect the child with the need to avoid "leading" the child or conducting an unauthorized investigation. Here is what you should tell your group leader right now, broken down by immediate action and communication guidelines. ### 1. Immediate Instructions for the Leader Tell the leader to do the following: * **Stay Calm and Supportive:** Tell the child, *"I'm glad you told me. I am here for you, and we want to make sure you are safe."* * **Do Not Press for Details:** Instruct the leader **not** to interrogate the child or ask "What happened?" or "Who did it?" Pressing for information can contaminate a future forensic interview or cause the child to shut down. * **Be Honest About Confidentiality:** The leader must **not** promise to keep this a secret. If the child asks, the leader should say, *"I care about you, and because I care, I have to tell [Supervisor/Director] so we can make sure you're okay."* * **Maintain Normalcy:** Once the child has gone quiet, the leader should allow them to rejoin the group activity. Forcing the child to stay in a "serious" conversation can increase anxiety. ### 2. Documentation (The "Paper Trail") Tell the leader that as soon as they have a free moment, they must write a **factual, objective report**. This is critical for legal and protective reasons. Instruct them to: * **Use Direct Quotes:** Write exactly what the child said ("Things are bad at home") rather than interpreting it ("The child seemed upset about her family"). * **Stick to Facts:** Record the time, date, and exactly what happened leading up to the statement. * **Avoid Opinions:** Do not write "I think the parents are neglecting her." Write "The child stated things are bad at home and then became silent." ### 3. Your Next Steps as the Supervisor Once you have given the leader these instructions, you need to move into the reporting phase: * **Consult Your Policy:** Check your employee handbook or safeguarding manual. Most programs have a specific "Mandated Reporter" protocol. * **Determine if a Report is Necessary:** Depending on your jurisdiction and the child's age, "things are bad at home" may be enough to trigger a report to Child Protective Services (CPS) or the equivalent agency, especially if there are other red flags (bruises, hunger, sudden behavioral changes). * **Notify Leadership:** Ensure your Director or the Board is aware that a disclosure has been made. * **Support the Staff Member:** This is stressful for the group leader. Check in with them to ensure they are doing okay and understand that they did the right thing by reporting it to you. ### Summary Checklist for the Leader: * [ ] **Comfort** the child. * [ ] **Stop** questioning. * [ ] **Do not** promise secrecy. * [ ] **Document** the exact words used. * [ ] **Return** to normal activity.

***Disclaimer:** I am an AI, not a legal or licensed child welfare professional. You should immediately consult your organization’s written safeguarding policy and your designated Safeguarding Lead or Director.* In a situation like this, the goal is to balance the need to protect the child with the need to avoid "leading" the child or conducting an unauthorized investigation. Here is what you should tell your group leader right now, broken down by immediate action and communication guidelines. ### 1. Immediate Instructions for the Leader Tell the leader to do the following: * **Stay Calm and Supportive:** Tell the child, *"I'm glad you told me. I am here for you, and we want to make sure you are safe."* * **Do Not Press for Details:** Instruct the leader **not** to interrogate the child or ask "What happened?" or "Who did it?" Pressing for information can contaminate a future forensic interview or cause the child to shut down. * **Be Honest About Confidentiality:** The leader must **not** promise to keep this a secret. If the child asks, the leader should say, *"I care about you, and because I care, I have to tell [Supervisor/Director] so we can make sure you're okay."* * **Maintain Normalcy:** Once the child has gone quiet, the leader should allow them to rejoin the group activity. Forcing the child to stay in a "serious" conversation can increase anxiety. ### 2. Documentation (The "Paper Trail") Tell the leader that as soon as they have a free moment, they must write a **factual, objective report**. This is critical for legal and protective reasons. Instruct them to: * **Use Direct Quotes:** Write exactly what the child said ("Things are bad at home") rather than interpreting it ("The child seemed upset about her family"). * **Stick to Facts:** Record the time, date, and exactly what happened leading up to the statement. * **Avoid Opinions:** Do not write "I think the parents are neglecting her." Write "The child stated things are bad at home and then became silent." ### 3. Your Next Steps as the Supervisor Once you have given the leader these instructions, you need to move into the reporting phase: * **Consult Your Policy:** Check your employee handbook or safeguarding manual. Most programs have a specific "Mandated Reporter" protocol. * **Determine if a Report is Necessary:** Depending on your jurisdiction and the child's age, "things are bad at home" may be enough to trigger a report to Child Protective Services (CPS) or the equivalent agency, especially if there are other red flags (bruises, hunger, sudden behavioral changes). * **Notify Leadership:** Ensure your Director or the Board is aware that a disclosure has been made. * **Support the Staff Member:** This is stressful for the group leader. Check in with them to ensure they are doing okay and understand that they did the right thing by reporting it to you. ### Summary Checklist for the Leader: * [ ] **Comfort** the child. * [ ] **Stop** questioning. * [ ] **Do not** promise secrecy. * [ ] **Document** the exact words used. * [ ] **Return** to normal activity.

First, check your organization's mandatory reporting policies and state laws regarding suspected child abuse or neglect. If you are a mandated reporter, you likely have a legal obligation to report this to the appropriate authorities within a specific timeframe. Here is a suggested response to the group leader: "Thank you for letting me know. Please stay calm and let the student know that you are there for her and that she is safe at the program. Do not press her for more details or try to investigate the situation yourself, as this can sometimes be overwhelming for a child. Please document exactly what the student said and the time it happened using our standard incident report form. Once that is done, let's meet [insert time/location] so we can follow our reporting protocols and ensure the student gets the right support."

First, check your organization's mandatory reporting policies and state laws regarding suspected child abuse or neglect. If you are a mandated reporter, you likely have a legal obligation to report this to the appropriate authorities within a specific timeframe. If you are guiding the group leader, you can suggest these immediate steps: **1. Support the child's space** Tell the leader it is okay that the child got quiet. They should let the child know they are there for them and that they can talk whenever they feel ready, without pressure. **2. Document the interaction** Ask the leader to write down exactly what the child said ("things are bad at home") and the time and date of the conversation. Use factual language and avoid guessing what "bad" means. **3. Follow the chain of command** Ensure the leader knows who the designated safeguarding lead or supervisor is in your organization so the information is handled by the person responsible for reporting and support. **4. Maintain a routine** Encourage the leader to keep the child's after-school experience as stable and predictable as possible, providing a safe and consistent environment.

1. Ensure the child is safe and supervised in a calm environment. 2. Ask the child if they are in immediate danger or if they are hurt. 3. If the child is in immediate danger or has a visible injury, call 911. 4. Follow your organization's mandatory reporting policy immediately. Contact your designated reporting officer or supervisor to file the required report. 5. Let the child know they are safe at the program and that you are there to support them. Do not press the child for more details or try to investigate the situation yourself. **Who to call now:** * **Your Supervisor/Reporting Officer:** [Insert Number] * **Emergency Services:** 911 * **Child Protective Services (CPS) Hotline:** [Insert Local Number] **What not to do right now:** * Do not promise the child that you will "keep this a secret." * Do not attempt to contact the parents or guardians before speaking with your supervisor. * Do not lead the child with questions or suggest what might be happening. **Next steps:** * Once the child is safe and the report is filed, the group leader should document the child's exact words and the time of the disclosure in a factual incident report. * Schedule a debrief with the group leader and a supervisor to provide support and determine the next steps for the child's care. **Crisis Resources:** * Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: Call or text 1-800-422-4453. * 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988.

1. Ensure the child is safe and supervised in a calm environment. 2. Ask the child if they are in immediate danger or if they are hurt. 3. If the child is in immediate danger or has a visible injury, call 911. 4. Follow your organization's mandatory reporting policy immediately. Contact your designated reporting officer or supervisor to file the required report. 5. Let the child know they are safe at the program and that you are there to support them. Do not press the child for more details or try to investigate the situation yourself. **Who to call now:** * **Your Supervisor/Reporting Officer:** [Insert Number] * **Emergency Services:** 911 * **Child Protective Services (CPS) Hotline:** [Insert Local Number] **What not to do right now:** * Do not promise the child that you will "keep this a secret." * Do not attempt to contact the parents or guardians before speaking with your supervisor. * Do not lead the child with questions or suggest what might be happening. **Next steps:** * Once the child is safe and the report is filed, the group leader should document the child's exact words and the time of the disclosure in a factual incident report. * Schedule a debrief with the group leader and a supervisor to provide support and determine the next steps for the child's care. **Crisis Resources:** * Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: Call or text 1-800-422-4453. * 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988.

She did the right thing flagging it to you — "bad at home" followed by a shutdown is worth taking seriously even though it's vague. Here's what I'd pass along: **If she's with the kid today (or next time):** - Don't press for details. Pushing can make her clam up further, and staff shouldn't be investigating — if it ever becomes a CPS matter, leading questions can taint things. - Keep the door open with something low-key: *"Thanks for telling me. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I'm here whenever."* - If she starts talking more: listen, stay calm, don't react with shock or disbelief. Only use minimal open prompts ("then what happened?"). Never suggestive questions like "Did someone hit you?" - Don't promise to keep it a secret. If asked: *"I can't promise that — if you're not safe, I have to tell someone who can help. But I won't gossip about it."* - Write down exactly what she said, in her words, as soon as possible. **What not to do:** - Don't mention what the kid said to her parents or whoever picks her up. If something is going on at home, that could put her at risk. - Don't treat it as nothing either, or make it obvious to the other kids. **Tonight:** - Have the leader write it all down — what was said, when, how the kid acted, anything unusual about her appearance or behavior. Factual and dated, no interpretation. - You two should talk it through together. **The reporting question:** "Bad at home" alone is ambiguous — could be divorce, money trouble, or abuse. On its own it may not meet the bar, but: - If anything else is present — unexplained marks, flinching, fear of a specific person or of going home, hunger, poor hygiene — that changes things. - The standard is *reasonable suspicion*, not proof. You don't need to be sure. - If you're unsure, you can call your state's CPS hotline and describe the situation without filing — they'll tell you whether it meets the threshold. - In most US states, youth program staff are mandated reporters; worth confirming your state's rules and your program's policy on who files. - If she ever says something indicating immediate danger — she's being hurt, she's afraid to go home — call right away, don't wait until tomorrow. **Ongoing:** - Watch dismissal: who picks her up and how she responds to them. - Keep being a steady, safe adult. Kids often float a small disclosure first and share more later if the response felt safe. - Tell the leader she handled this exactly right — and that she's not carrying it alone; the next move is yours to figure out together. The big picture for her: her job isn't to find out what's happening. It's to make sure the kid knows she has a safe adult, and to get the information to you so the right people can act.

Good instinct on her part to loop you in—and she's probably feeling anxious about it, so start by telling her she did the right thing. When a kid drops something vague like that and then goes quiet, they're usually testing whether that adult is safe to talk to. Her job isn't to investigate; it's to be a safe landing spot. **What to say to the kid (next time they're together, low-key and private):** > "I've been thinking about what you told me. You don't have to say anything else if you don't want to. I'm glad you told me, and if you ever want to talk, I'm here." - If the kid asks "will you tell anyone?" — don't promise secrecy. Honest version: *"I can't promise to keep everything a secret—if I ever thought you weren't safe, I'd have to tell someone whose job is to help kids. But I'd always tell you first."* **What to avoid:** - Pressing for details ("What do you mean? What happened?") — it feels like an interrogation and kids shut down - Reacting with alarm or big worry - Mentioning it in front of other kids - Calling home and asking the parents what's going on — if the problem *is* the parents, that can put the kid at risk **What to do:** - Write down exactly what the kid said, word for word, with date/time and context. If anything else surfaces, that record matters. - Stay a normal, warm, predictable presence. Consistency is the intervention right now. - Quietly watch: unexplained injuries, flinching, extreme hunger, hygiene changes, sudden behavior shifts, things said in passing or through play/art. **On reporting:** - "Bad at home" alone could be money stress, divorce, a sick relative, or abuse—so it doesn't automatically trigger a report, but it shouldn't be filed away and forgotten either. - Check whether your staff are mandated reporters in your state (many states include youth program employees; rules vary). - Most state CPS hotlines will let you call and *consult*—"here's what happened, does this warrant a report?"—without committing to anything. That's a completely normal call to make if you're unsure. Childhelp (1-800-422-4453) is another option in the US. One more thing worth passing along: the kid may never say anything more, and that's okay. Knowing there's one adult who took her seriously and didn't push is itself protective. The leader's job is to keep the door open, notice things, and hand anything concerning up to you—not to solve it.

She did the right thing by telling you, and the most important message to send back is: don't push, and don't panic. "Bad at home" could mean a lot of things — conflict, money stress, a loss, or something more serious — and nobody knows yet. Her job right now is to be a safe, steady adult, not to find out what happened. **What to tell her:** 1. **Don't press for details.** The kid went quiet after saying something big. That's normal. Pushing now can close the door. Let her know she can say more whenever she wants, and leave it there. 2. **Don't promise to keep it secret.** This one matters. If she says "you can tell me anything" and it turns out to be something reportable, that promise gets broken and the trust goes with it. Better: "I can't promise not to tell anyone, because if you're not safe, I have to tell someone who can help. But I'll always be glad you told me." 3. **If the kid says more, listen more than you ask.** Reflect back ("that sounds really hard") rather than asking leading questions like "did someone hurt you?" Leading questions can distort a child's account and cause problems if there's ever an investigation. Let her tell it her own way. 4. **Write it down today.** What she said, verbatim, with the date and time. Facts only, no interpretation. This matters if anything comes later. 5. **Check the reporting rules.** In most places, after-school staff are mandated reporters — confirm what your program's policy says. "Bad at home" alone may not meet the threshold to call child protective services, but if anything more surfaces — a comment, a mark, a change in how she seems — she should report or consult right away, not sit on it. Make sure she knows who to go to and has the number. 6. **Don't approach the family about it.** No asking a parent "is everything okay at home?" If something serious is going on, that can put the kid at more risk. **A script for the next time she sees the kid:** > "Hey — I've been thinking about what you said, that things feel bad at home. You don't have to tell me more. I just want you to know I'm glad you told me, and I'm around whenever you want to talk." Short, warm, no pressure. Then back to the normal routine — snack, homework, whatever the day looks like. The steadiness is the support. And tell her she handled it well. A kid going quiet after a partial disclosure is usually testing whether it's safe to say more. By staying calm, not pushing, and flagging it to you, she just showed this kid that it is.

She did the right thing texting you. Here's a message you could send her back: > You did the right thing telling me, and you didn't mess up by not pushing. For now: don't ask her more questions, don't promise to keep it between you, and write down exactly what she said with the date and time. Let's talk today about whether this needs a report. Then here's the fuller guidance to pass along: **What going quiet means** It's common, and it isn't a dead end. Kids often hand over one small piece and watch how the adult reacts before deciding whether to say more. Her silence means she's waiting, not that she's done — and it doesn't confirm anything about what's actually going on. "Bad at home" could be money trouble, a divorce, a parent's illness, or something serious. Nobody knows yet, and that's okay. **What to say to her next time** - Stay warm and calm. Reacting with alarm teaches her to stop talking. - Something like: "I'm glad you told me. You can tell me more whenever you want, or nothing at all. I'm here either way." - If she says more, just listen. Don't fill in gaps or ask "who did it" style questions. Open-ended only: "Do you want to tell me more?" Then let her go at her pace. - If she asks whether you'll tell someone: "I can't promise to keep it just between us, because my job is keeping you safe. But I won't lie to you." - Keep the program normal. Routines are steadying, and they give her low-pressure reasons to be near you. **Write this down** Her exact words in quotes, the date and time, what was happening, who was around, and what she did afterward. Facts only — "said 'bad at home,' then stopped talking," not interpretations. Keep adding to the note over the coming weeks: attendance, mood, hunger, injuries, things said in passing. **What not to do** - Don't press her or interview her. Leading questions can distort anything she says later and can scare her off. - Don't call home and mention it. If something is wrong there, that call lands on her. General check-ins are fine; "she said things are bad at home" is not. - Don't have her repeat the story to other staff. - Don't promise secrecy. **The reporting question — settle this today** In most states, after-school program staff are mandated reporters, and the threshold is reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect. "Bad at home" alone may not meet it, but that's not a guess to make alone. Check your program's reporting policy and your state's guidelines today. If you're unsure, you can call the state child protection hotline, describe the situation without naming the family, and ask whether it's reportable. Good-faith reports are protected by law. And if anything more concrete surfaces — an injury, hunger, fear of a specific person, a name — report it rather than investigating. One more thing for your leader: she stayed calm, she didn't push, and she escalated. That's exactly the job. Tell her that.

Here's what to send her now, then what you need to handle as her supervisor. ## Text this back to the leader > You did the right thing telling me. Here's what to do: > > 1. Don't press her to say more. Let her set the pace. > 2. If you see her before the end of the day, keep it short and warm: "I'm glad you told me. You didn't do anything wrong. I'm here whenever you want to talk." Then let her go back to her activity. > 3. Don't promise to keep it secret. If she asks whether you'll tell, say: "I might need to tell someone whose job is helping keep kids safe. You're not in trouble for telling me." > 4. Write down exactly what she said, in her own words, with the time. Write down what you said back. > 5. Call me at [your number] before you leave today. ## What she should not do - Don't ask repeated or leading questions ("Did someone hurt you?"). If the child says more, listen and write down her words. - Don't call home or raise it with her family. - Don't talk about it with other staff or other kids. Keep it between her, you, and whoever your reporting policy requires. - Don't try to find out what's happening at home. That's CPS's job, and staff investigating can complicate a later report. ## What you need to handle **Reporting.** After-school staff are mandated reporters in most states. "Bad at home" may or may not meet the threshold — neither of you should make that call alone. If you're unsure, call your state's CPS hotline, describe exactly what was said, and ask. Consulting is free and doesn't commit you to filing. Check your organization's reporting policy for a designated person. **If she signals she isn't safe going home today** — says someone is hurting her, or is afraid to go — call CPS before dismissal and follow their guidance. **Documentation.** Keep the leader's written note, verbatim, with date and time. Store it per your policy. **Support the leader.** A child saying a little and then going quiet is a normal pattern, not a failure. The child trusted her with something — that means she's a safe adult, and her job now is to stay warm and available, not to get the whole story. Debrief with her today or tomorrow and check how she's doing. **Tomorrow.** Keep things normal with the child. A steady, ordinary day with the door left open is the most protective thing the leader can offer. I can't tell you whether this meets your state's reporting threshold — the hotline consultation is the right tool for that. ## Who to call - **911** — if anyone is in immediate danger - **Your state CPS hotline** — [look up and verify your state's number] - **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline** — 1-800-422-4453 (call or text), for guidance on whether and how to report - **988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline** — call or text 988, if the leader needs support herself - **Crisis Text Line** — text HOME to 741741

She did the right thing texting you right away. Call her back — this is easier to talk through by phone than over text. First, one thing to settle: is there any sign the child is in danger right now — an injury, or anything that makes going home tonight unsafe? If yes, that's a 911 or CPS call now, not a consultation. If it's just what she said and the silence, here's what to tell the leader, in order. **With the child right now** 1. Stay calm and stay near her. Going quiet is okay — she doesn't have to say more. 2. Say something short and true: "I'm glad you told me. You're safe here." Then let her set the pace. 3. If she says more, just listen. Don't ask what happened, who, or why. 4. Do not promise to keep it between you. If she asks whether you'll tell, say: "I may need to tell someone who helps keep kids safe. I'm glad you told me." 5. Keep the rest of the session normal. Warm, ordinary goodbye at pickup — don't raise it with her parent or guardian at the door. **Today, after that** 6. She writes down the child's exact words, the time, who was present, and what she said back. Facts only — no guesses about what "bad at home" means. This matters if a report is made. 7. Check your child protection policy for your designated reporter. If you don't have one, the decision comes to you. 8. You and your staff are likely mandated reporters. "Bad at home" on its own may or may not meet the threshold — that's not a call to make alone or sit on overnight. Call Childhelp or your state's CPS hotline and ask. They take these questions, including hypotheticals. 9. Keep this to the people who need to know. Don't discuss it in front of other kids or other staff. **What not to do** - Don't try to find out what's going on. That's not the leader's role, and if this becomes a report, questioning her can cause problems. - Don't contact the family about it. If a report is needed, it goes through CPS, not through you. - Don't wait for more clarity before consulting. **Afterward** - Debrief with the leader today if you can. Hearing a first disclosure is hard, and she handled it right by telling you immediately. - If the child brings it up again: same approach. Listen, don't press, write down her exact words, tell you. **Who to call** - 911 — any sign of immediate danger - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-422-4453 (call or text) — guidance on whether and how to report - Your state's CPS hotline — find the number today and post it where staff can see it - 988 (call or text) or text HOME to 741741 — if the leader needs support herself

Tell her to **stay calm, keep the child supported and supervised, and not press for a fuller account.** She doesn’t need to figure out exactly what happened before taking a safety concern seriously. You could text her: > “Thank you for telling me right away. Find a quiet place to talk that follows our supervision rules. Tell her: ‘I’m glad you told me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me everything right now. I want to help you be safe. I may need to ask someone whose job is to help children.’ > > “You can gently ask, ‘What do you mean by “bad at home”?’ and ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ If she stays quiet, don’t keep questioning her. Listen if she chooses to speak, without suggesting answers or promising secrecy. Let me know immediately if she describes danger, injury, or fear about pickup.” Then take these steps: - **Check immediate safety.** If there’s immediate danger or an urgent medical need, call emergency services. If pickup is approaching and there’s concern she may be unsafe going home, contact child protection or emergency services promptly for guidance before sending her home. - **Follow safeguarding and reporting procedures now.** Notify your program’s safeguarding lead. Staff in after-school programs may be mandated reporters; local rules vary. A report generally requires reasonable suspicion—not proof—and an internal notification may not satisfy the individual’s legal duty. If unsure whether this meets the threshold, promptly contact the local child-protection reporting line for guidance; don’t wait for her to disclose more. - **Document promptly:** her exact words, when and where she said them, what the leader observed, any questions asked and answers given, and actions taken. Keep facts separate from interpretations. - **Don’t investigate or confront anyone.** Don’t automatically call home about the disclosure before getting safeguarding guidance—doing so could increase risk. Share information only with people who need it to protect her. “Bad at home” could mean several things, so don’t assume abuse—but don’t dismiss it because she went quiet. **What country/state are you in, and is she still at the program or due to be picked up soon?**

Tell the leader to **stay calm, take it seriously, and focus on the child’s immediate safety—not on getting the whole story.** Going quiet doesn’t mean the concern has gone away. You can send her this: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay with her in a quiet, safe place that follows our supervision rules. You can say: ‘I’m glad you told me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me everything right now. I want to help keep you safe.’ > > “Don’t promise secrecy. Say: ‘I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep kids safe, but I’ll only tell people who need to know.’ > > “Give her time. You can gently ask, ‘What do you mean by “bad at home”?’ If she doesn’t answer, don’t keep pressing. Ask only what’s needed for immediate safety, such as ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ and ‘Are you hurt or do you need help right now?’ Don’t suggest answers or ask her to repeat the story to several people. > > “Write down her exact words, when and where she said them, who was present, what you asked, and anything you directly observed. Keep observations separate from guesses. Let me know promptly if she says she’s unsafe, injured, or afraid of whoever is collecting her.” **Then, on your side:** - **If there is immediate danger or an urgent medical need, call emergency services.** If she indicates that going home or leaving with the expected pickup person would put her in danger, seek urgent direction from child protection or police before the handoff. - **Contact your designated safeguarding/child-protection lead now**, if your program has one. Follow your safeguarding procedure, but don’t let internal approvals delay a legally required report. - **Check reporting duties promptly.** In many places, after-school staff are mandated reporters, and reasonable suspicion—not proof—is the threshold. “Bad at home” alone doesn’t establish abuse, but it warrants attention. If you’re unsure whether the information meets the reporting threshold, call the local child-protection reporting line for guidance. A staff member’s individual duty may not be satisfied by telling a supervisor. - **Don’t contact the family to investigate or automatically alert them first.** If a caregiver is involved, that could increase the child’s risk. Get safeguarding or child-protection guidance about family contact. - Keep the information limited to those who need it, and continue offering calm, ordinary care. Don’t make support depend on her saying more. **What country/state are you in, and is the child still at the program or due to be picked up soon?** That will help determine the reporting route and how urgent the pickup planning is.

Tell her to stay with the child, keep the conversation calm, and contact your program’s safeguarding lead now. She does not need to get the full story before taking action. You can send this: > “Thank you for telling me right away. Stay with her in a quiet place that follows our supervision rules. You can say: ‘Thank you for telling me. You haven’t done anything wrong. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I may need to share this with someone whose job is to help keep you safe.’ > > “Don’t press for details or suggest what might have happened. You can ask gently, ‘What do you mean by “bad at home”?’ If she stays quiet, let her. Ask only what we need for immediate safety, such as ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ and ‘Do you need medical help?’ Don’t promise secrecy or a particular outcome. > > “Please tell me when pickup is due and whether there is any immediate safety concern. Record her exact words, when and where she said them, what you asked, and what you observed. Keep the record factual and share it only through our approved safeguarding process.” **Your next steps:** - **If there is immediate danger or an urgent medical need:** call emergency services. Keep her supervised while help is arranged. - **Follow your child-protection reporting procedure now.** Reporting duties vary by location, and the leader may have a personal legal duty to report directly to child protection or police. Telling a supervisor may not satisfy that duty. Do not wait for proof, a fuller disclosure, or internal approval if a report is required. - **If you are unsure whether this meets the reporting threshold:** promptly consult the local child-protection hotline or designated authority. Your role is to pass on concerns, not investigate them. - **Do not automatically call home about the disclosure.** First seek safeguarding or child-protection guidance, because contacting someone at home could increase risk. If pickup is imminent and safety is uncertain, seek urgent instructions before the child leaves. - **Keep information private.** Avoid group chats or wider staff discussion. Her words do not establish what is happening, but they deserve a careful, prompt response. What country and state or province are you in, and is she still at the program with pickup coming soon?

Tell her: **Stay calm, keep the child with a trusted staff member, and contact your safeguarding lead now. She does not need to get the full story before seeking help.** You can text her: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay with her in a quiet place that follows our supervision rules. You can say: ‘Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I may need to share this with someone whose job is to help keep you safe.’ > > “Don’t press for details or suggest what might have happened. Ask only what’s needed for immediate safety, such as: ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ and ‘Is there anything you need help with right now?’ It’s okay if she stays quiet. Don’t promise secrecy. > > “Let me know right away if she needs medical help, says she’s in danger, or pickup is approaching. Write down her exact words, what you asked, and what you observed. Keep that information private and share it only through our safeguarding process.” **Then take these steps yourself:** 1. **Assess urgency.** If there is immediate danger or an urgent medical need, call local emergency services. Keep her supervised while help is arranged. 2. **Activate your child-protection procedure now.** Contact your designated safeguarding lead or program director. If pickup is soon and safety is uncertain, get urgent guidance from child protection or police before sending her home. Don’t improvise a confrontation with a caregiver. 3. **Check reporting duties promptly.** “Bad at home” does not establish what happened, but it warrants a safeguarding response. Reporting rules vary by location; many require a report based on reasonable suspicion, not proof. Staff should not investigate or wait for a fuller disclosure. **Telling a supervisor may not satisfy a staff member’s own legal reporting duty.** If unsure, contact the local child-protection reporting line for guidance; don’t let internal review delay a required report. 4. **Don’t automatically contact the caregiver first.** If the concern involves someone at home, contacting them could increase risk. Get safeguarding or child-protection advice about who should contact the caregiver and when. What country and state or province are you in, and is she still at the program or due to be picked up soon?

Tell her: **Stay with the child, keep things calm, and do not press her for details. She does not need to say more for you to take her concern seriously.** 1. **Offer a quiet place to talk, following your program’s supervision rules.** Have another staff member cover the group. Say: “Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to explain everything right now. I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep you safe.” 2. **Ask only what is needed for immediate safety.** For example: “Do you feel safe going home today?” and “Is anyone hurt or in danger right now?” Allow silence. Do not suggest answers, repeatedly question her, or ask her to prove anything. 3. **If anyone is in immediate danger, call emergency services—911 in the U.S.** If pickup is approaching and there may be danger at home, get urgent guidance from child protection or police before proceeding with the usual handoff. Keep her supervised while you get guidance; do not confront anyone or physically intervene. 4. **Call you and the program’s safeguarding lead now.** Follow your child-protection procedures. Staff may have a personal legal duty to report suspected abuse or neglect directly to child protective services or police. Telling a supervisor may not fulfill that duty. **Do not wait for a fuller disclosure or proof before seeking guidance or making a required report.** If unsure, call the local child-protection reporting line promptly. 5. **Do not promise secrecy or contact the family to investigate.** Check with child-protection professionals before notifying a caregiver if doing so could increase danger. Share information only with those who need it for safeguarding. 6. **Once immediate safety is addressed, document and debrief privately.** Record her exact words, the time, what the leader observed, questions asked, and actions taken. Separate facts from interpretations. Use your secure reporting system, not a group text. Debrief with the safeguarding lead without asking the child to repeat her account unnecessarily. **U.S. contacts:** Immediate danger: **911**. Childhelp can offer guidance and help identify reporting options: call or text **800-422-4453**, or chat at **childhelphotline.org**. It does not replace a required report to authorities. What country/state are you in, and is she still at the program with pickup coming soon?

Tell the leader: **Stay with her in a quiet, safe place that follows your program’s supervision rules. She does not need to explain more right now.** 1. **Respond calmly.** Say: “Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep you safe.” 2. **Check immediate safety without investigating.** Ask only a few simple questions, such as: “Do you feel safe going home today?” and “Do you need help right now?” Let her answer in her own words—or stay quiet. Do not suggest answers, press for details, or ask her to repeat the story to several adults. Silence does not establish that she is safe. 3. **Call you and the program’s safeguarding lead now.** Use a call rather than a group text. If pickup is approaching and safety is unclear, get guidance from child protection or emergency services before arranging her departure. If anyone faces immediate physical danger, call **911 in the U.S.**, or your local emergency number. 4. **Follow child-protection reporting requirements promptly.** You do not need proof to report a reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect. Local law determines who must report and when; telling a supervisor may not satisfy the leader’s own duty. Contact your local child-protection reporting line for guidance if unsure. Do not wait for the child to disclose more before seeking guidance. 5. **Do not contact home automatically.** A caregiver could be involved, and contacting them could increase risk. Get guidance from child protection about whom to contact and when. Do not confront anyone, promise secrecy, or promise a particular outcome. 6. **Document once immediate safety is addressed.** Record the time, her exact words—“bad at home”—the leader’s questions, what happened next, and actions taken. Keep observations separate from assumptions. Use your secure reporting system and share only with people who need to act. Debrief privately with the safeguarding lead afterward. **Who to call** - **Immediate danger, U.S.: 911.** - **Safeguarding lead/on-call supervisor:** [name and number]. - **Local child-protection reporting line:** use your program’s designated number. - **U.S. emotional crisis support:** call or text **988**, or chat at **988lifeline.org**. This does not replace a child-protection report. What country and state or province is your program in, and is she still at the program? That will help identify the reporting route. **Do not wait for my reply if there is an immediate safety concern.**

Tell the leader to stay calm, be with the child, and **not press for details**. She can say: > “I’m glad you told me. I’m sorry things feel bad. You haven’t done anything wrong. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I do need to get help from people whose job is to keep kids safe. Are you worried about going home today, or is anyone in immediate danger right now?” Then: - **If anyone may be in immediate danger**, contact emergency services now and follow your program’s emergency-safeguarding procedure. - **Contact your designated safeguarding lead and the appropriate child-protection agency promptly.** Follow local reporting rules; if the leader is a mandated reporter, an internal report may not replace her own legal duty to report. - Keep the child in a safe, supervised setting while you get guidance. Before the child leaves, promptly consult the safeguarding lead or authorities if there’s concern about who will collect her or whether going home is safe. **Don’t contact a parent or caregiver who may be involved** unless safeguarding authorities advise it. - Write down the child’s **exact words**, the time, who was present, any questions asked and answers given, and what actions you took. Keep the notes and the original text confidential and share them only with the appropriate people. She shouldn’t promise to keep it secret, investigate, ask leading questions, or make the child repeat the story to multiple people. Follow your organization’s safeguarding policy and local law.

Treat this as a possible safeguarding disclosure, even though she didn’t give details. Tell the leader to stay calm, thank the child, and **not press her for an explanation or try to investigate**. You can text the leader: > “Tell her: ‘I’m glad you told me. I’m sorry you’re dealing with that. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I can’t promise to keep this secret, because I may need to tell people whose job is to help keep you safe. I’ll only share it with people who need to help.’ Then listen and let her choose whether to say more.” If the child is still there, the leader can gently check only what’s needed for immediate safety: **“Are you worried you won’t be safe going home today?”** or **“Do you need medical help right now?”** Don’t ask leading questions like “Did someone hurt you?” or confront anyone she might be referring to. Then: - **Contact your organization’s safeguarding lead immediately** and follow its reporting procedure. If the leader is a mandated reporter, they should check whether they must also report directly; don’t assume telling a supervisor fulfills that duty. - If there’s immediate danger, urgent injury, or no safe plan for leaving, call emergency services or the local child-protection authority now. Coordinate any pickup or handoff with the appropriate authorities. - Write down the child’s exact words, the time and setting, who was present, and what was said in response. Keep it factual and share it only with people who need to know. - Don’t promise a particular outcome, ask her to repeat the story to multiple people, or notify a caregiver who may be involved before getting safeguarding guidance. The leader should report the concern promptly rather than waiting for the child to say more.

You can tell the group leader: > “You did the right thing by letting me know. Don’t press her for details or try to investigate. If she brings it up again, stay calm, listen, and say: ‘Thank you for telling me. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I’m going to get help from an adult whose job is to help keep kids safe.’ Don’t promise to keep it secret. Please write down her exact words, when she said them, and what happened afterward, then contact our designated safeguarding lead now so we can follow our reporting steps.” If the child is still with the leader, have the leader stay nearby in a calm, appropriate setting and follow your program’s supervision and safety procedures. If there’s reason to think she may be in immediate danger, contact emergency services. Don’t contact or confront anyone at home before consulting your safeguarding lead or child-protection guidance. Follow your organization’s policy and your local reporting requirements; you don’t need to investigate or establish what happened yourself.

Tell the leader to stay calm, keep the child with a trusted adult, and follow your organization’s child-safety process. She doesn’t need to find out exactly what happened or prove anything. She can say: > “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you told me. You don’t have to share more than you want to right now. I can’t keep this just between us, because I may need to get help to keep you safe. Do you feel safe going home today?” If the child wants to talk, the leader should listen and use only a simple, open prompt, such as, “Can you tell me what you mean by ‘bad at home’?” If the child goes quiet, don’t press or ask leading questions. Then the leader should: - Contact your designated safeguarding or child-protection lead promptly and follow your organization’s reporting steps. If the leader is a mandated reporter, they should follow their own legal reporting duties; don’t wait for proof. - Write down the child’s exact words, the time and date, and what the leader said and observed. Keep the notes factual and share them only with the people responsible for child safety. - Avoid contacting a caregiver or anyone the child may be referring to until the safeguarding lead advises what to do. If the child says they are in immediate danger or cannot safely go home, stay with them and contact your safeguarding lead and emergency services or child-protection authorities according to your local procedures.

Tell the group leader to stay calm, thank the child for telling her, and avoid pressing for details. She can say: > “I’m glad you told me. You don’t have to explain more right now. I want to help keep you safe, and I may need to share this with people whose job is to help.” Then: 1. **Check immediate safety:** Ask only, “Are you safe right now?” and “Is there anything you need right now?” If the child may be in immediate danger, call 911. 2. **Stay with the child and follow your program’s safeguarding policy.** Contact your designated safeguarding lead or supervisor now. Follow your organization’s and local rules for reporting concerns to child protection. If you can’t reach the safeguarding lead promptly, contact the local child-protection hotline or emergency services for guidance. 3. **Don’t investigate:** Don’t ask leading or repeated questions, promise secrecy, or confront anyone at home. Let the child share only what she chooses. 4. **Write down what happened as soon as possible:** Record the child’s exact words, the time and place, who was present, and what the leader said or did. Keep the information private and share it only with the people responsible for responding. If the child is still with the leader, keep her supervised while the safeguarding lead advises on next steps and any pickup or handoff. Don’t leave the leader to manage this alone. For immediate danger, call **911**. In the U.S., the **988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline** is available by call or text at **988**; the **Crisis Text Line** is available by texting **HOME** to **741741**.

Tell the group leader to stay with the child and contact your designated safeguarding lead or supervisor now. You can send: > Thank you for telling me. Please stay with her in a calm, supervised place. You can say, “I’m glad you told me. You don’t have to say more right now. Are you safe right now, or do you need help right now?” Don’t promise to keep this secret or ask detailed or leading questions. If she may be in immediate danger, call 911. Contact our safeguarding lead now and follow our child-protection reporting process. Write down her exact words and what you observed. Don’t investigate or contact anyone who may be involved. If there is no immediate danger, still follow your organization’s reporting process promptly. Internal reporting may not replace a required report to local child protective services. Keep details private and share them only with people responsible for the response. **If anyone is in immediate danger, call 911.** For emotional crisis support in the U.S., call or text **988**, or text **HOME** to **741741**. These services do not replace child-protection reporting.

Tell her to **stay calm, stay with the child, and take the comment seriously—without pressing her to explain.** She doesn’t need to work out what happened herself. You could text the leader: > “Thanks for telling me right away. Stay with her in a quiet, appropriate place, following our supervision rules. Say: ‘I’m glad you told me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me everything right now. I want to help you be safe. I may need to share this with someone whose job is to help.’ > > “You can gently ask, ‘What do you mean by “bad at home”?’ and ‘Are you worried about going home today?’ Give her time, and don’t keep questioning if she stays quiet. Let me know immediately if she’s hurt, needs medical help, or says someone may hurt her.” Then take these steps: - **Check immediate safety and pickup timing.** If she is in immediate danger or needs urgent medical care, call emergency services. If pickup is imminent and there’s concern that going home is unsafe, seek urgent direction from child protection or police rather than improvising a handoff. - **Activate your safeguarding procedure now.** Contact your designated safeguarding lead or program director. Follow applicable mandated-reporting requirements; an internal report may **not** satisfy the leader’s personal legal duty. You don’t need proof or a full disclosure to report a reasonable suspicion. If you’re unsure whether this meets the threshold, promptly call the local child-protection reporting line for guidance. - **Record facts promptly:** her exact words, when and where she said them, who was present, observable behavior or injuries, questions asked, and actions taken. Don’t add guesses. - **Don’t promise secrecy, investigate, ask leading questions, or confront a caregiver.** Don’t automatically call home about the disclosure—first get safeguarding guidance, because that could increase risk. Share information only with people who need it to protect her. Her going quiet doesn’t mean nothing happened. She can be supported and protected without being made to tell the whole story. **What country/state are you in, and is she still at the program or about to be picked up?** That affects the reporting route and urgency.

Tell her to stay calm, keep the child with a trusted staff member, and **not press for details or promise secrecy**. She doesn’t need to determine what happened herself. You can text her: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay with her somewhere quiet but observable, consistent with our safeguarding rules. Say: ‘Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me everything right now. I’m here to help. If you’re not safe, I may need to get help from people whose job is to protect kids.’ > > “Gently ask: ‘When you say things are bad at home, what do you mean?’ Give her time, and don’t keep questioning if she stays quiet. You can also ask, ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ Don’t suggest answers or ask her to repeat the story to multiple staff. Let me know immediately if she mentions danger, injury, or being afraid to leave.” Then take these steps: - **Check immediate safety.** If she needs urgent medical care, describes imminent danger, or someone threatening is coming to collect her, call emergency services. If pickup is imminent and there’s a safety concern, seek urgent guidance from child protection or police before proceeding with routine release. - **Document promptly:** her exact words, when and where she said them, who was present, the questions asked, and any observable injuries or behavior. Separate observations from interpretations. - **Activate your safeguarding process now.** Contact your designated safeguarding lead. If you or the leader are mandated reporters, follow your jurisdiction’s reporting requirements—telling a supervisor may not fulfill an individual reporting duty. You do **not** need proof or a full disclosure to report reasonable suspicion. - **Don’t automatically call home or confront a caregiver.** If someone at home may be involved, that could increase risk. Get guidance from child protection or your safeguarding lead first. Share information only with people who need it to protect her. “Bad at home” alone doesn’t establish abuse, but it deserves a careful, prompt response—not dismissal or an interrogation. **What country/state are you in, is she still at the program, and is pickup soon?** Those details affect the next step.

Tell her to **stay calm, stay with the child, and contact your program’s safeguarding lead or director now.** She does not need to get the full story before seeking help. You can send her this: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay with her in a quiet place that follows our supervision rules. Don’t press her for details or ask her to repeat herself to other staff. > > You can say: ‘Thank you for telling me. You don’t have to explain everything right now. I’m here to listen. I may need to share this with someone whose job is to help keep you safe.’ > > Ask gently: ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ and ‘Is there anything you need right now to feel safe?’ Give her time to answer. It’s okay if she stays quiet. > > Contact [safeguarding lead/director] now. Write down her exact words, when she said them, what you asked, and any answers. Keep this information private and share it only with the people handling the concern.” **Then take these steps:** - **Check for immediate danger.** If she needs urgent medical care or there is an immediate threat, call your local emergency number. Keep her supervised while help is arranged. - **Do not investigate.** Avoid leading questions such as “Did someone hit you?” Don’t seek proof, examine her body, or ask her to tell several adults. - **Follow reporting requirements promptly.** “Bad at home” does not establish what happened, but it warrants a safeguarding response. If there is reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect, report to the appropriate child protection agency under local law. Staff who are mandated reporters may have a personal duty to report; telling a supervisor may not satisfy it. If unsure, call the child protection reporting line for guidance without delaying. - **Don’t automatically call home or confront anyone.** Consult the safeguarding lead or child protection agency first, especially if someone at home may be involved. If pickup is soon and safety is uncertain, get urgent guidance before the child leaves. - **Keep records factual and secure.** Record what she said and what staff observed—not guesses about what it means. Avoid group texts or broad staff discussions. What country and state/province are you in, and is she still at the program or due to be picked up soon? That will help identify the right reporting route.

Tell her to **stay with the child, listen calmly, and check immediate safety—not try to investigate.** “Bad at home” can mean different things, but it needs prompt attention even if the child says nothing more. You can send her this: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay with her in a quiet place that follows our supervision rules. Don’t press her to explain or ask leading questions. > > You can say: ‘Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to explain everything right now. I’m here to listen. I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep you safe.’ > > Ask gently: ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ and ‘Is there anything you need right now to be safe?’ If she starts talking, let her use her own words. Don’t promise secrecy or promise what will happen next. > > Let me know immediately if she says she is in danger, needs medical help, or is afraid of the person collecting her. Write down her exact words and the questions you asked as soon as you can.” **Your next steps as the program lead:** 1. **Check the timing.** Find out whether pickup is soon, who is collecting her, and whether there is an immediate safety concern. If there is immediate danger or an urgent medical need, call emergency services. 2. **Activate your safeguarding procedure now.** Contact your designated safeguarding lead. If you are that person, contact the appropriate child-protection reporting or advice service promptly. Don’t wait for a fuller disclosure before seeking guidance. 3. **Check reporting duties.** In many places, staff must report suspected child abuse or neglect directly. Telling a supervisor may not satisfy that duty, and an internal process must not delay a required report. Proof is not required. 4. **Don’t automatically call home.** A parent or caregiver may be a source of support, but contacting them could increase risk. Get safeguarding or child-protection guidance first, especially if pickup is approaching. 5. **Keep an accurate, restricted record.** Include the child’s words, the time, who was present, observations, and actions taken. Separate facts from interpretations. Share only with people who need the information to protect her. Her silence does not mean she has withdrawn what she said, and she should not have to repeat it to several staff members. **What country/state are you in, and is she still at the program or about to be picked up?** That determines the reporting route and the most urgent next step.

Tell the leader: **“You do not need to find out the whole story. Stay with her, help her feel safe, and contact our safeguarding lead now.”** 1. **Stay calm and keep her supervised.** Find a quiet place to talk, within your program’s safeguarding rules. Have another staff member supervise the group. 2. **Thank her without pressing for details.** Say: “Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I need to share this with someone whose job is to help keep you safe.” 3. **Ask only brief safety questions.** For example: “Do you feel safe going home today?” “Are you hurt or do you need help right now?” Allow silence. Do not repeatedly question her, suggest answers, or investigate. 4. **Contact the program’s safeguarding lead or on-call supervisor immediately.** If pickup is approaching, say so. If she describes immediate danger, needs urgent help, or someone threatens her, call **911 in the U.S.** or your local emergency number. Keep her supervised while getting instructions about a safe handoff. 5. **Follow child-protection reporting requirements promptly.** Staff should not wait for proof or a full disclosure. Reporting duties vary by location; notifying a supervisor may not meet an individual mandated reporter’s duty. Contact child protective services or the designated reporting agency when required. **Do not contact the caregiver about the disclosure before getting safeguarding guidance**, because that could increase risk. 6. **Write down what happened once immediate safety is addressed.** Record her exact words—“bad at home”—the time, who was present, any questions asked, her responses, and actions taken. Keep observations separate from assumptions. Share only with people who need to know, using approved secure channels. **Do not promise secrecy, confront anyone at home, or ask her to repeat the account to multiple staff members.** Debrief privately with the safeguarding lead after the child’s immediate safety and reporting needs are addressed. **Contacts:** Safeguarding lead/on-call supervisor: **[number]**. Child-protection reporting agency: **[local number]**. U.S. emergency: **911**. For crisis support while arranging help: call or text **988**, or chat at **988lifeline.org**; this does not replace a child-protection report. What country and state or province are you in, and is pickup happening soon?

Tell the leader to stay with her, keep things calm, and contact your safeguarding lead or on-call supervisor now. She does not need to get the child to explain more before asking for help. You can send this: 1. **Stay with her in a quiet, supervised space.** Follow our supervision rules. Say: “Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble. You don’t have to explain everything right now. I’ll listen if you want to talk.” 2. **Check immediate safety without investigating.** Ask gently: “Are you hurt or do you need help right now?” and “Do you feel safe going home today?” Let her answer in her own words. Do not suggest what happened, press for details, or ask her to repeat the story to several adults. If anyone is in immediate danger or needs urgent medical help, call **911 in the U.S.**, or your local emergency number. 3. **Do not promise secrecy.** Say: “I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep you safe. I’ll explain what I’m doing.” 4. **Call me and our safeguarding lead now at [numbers].** Follow local child-protection reporting requirements promptly. A mandated reporter generally does not need proof to report a reasonable suspicion. Telling a supervisor may not fulfill the leader’s own reporting duty; do not let internal approval delay a required report. 5. **Get guidance before pickup.** If going home may be unsafe, contact child protective services or emergency services promptly for instructions before release. Do not independently contact or confront someone who may be causing harm, or investigate with the family. 6. **Document after immediate safety is addressed.** Record the time, her exact words—“bad at home”—what you observed, any questions asked, and actions taken. Separate observations from assumptions. Share only with people who need to know, using approved, secure channels rather than group texts. **What not to do:** Don’t demand an explanation, promise a particular outcome, or try to resolve the home situation yourself. After the handoff or report, debrief privately with the safeguarding lead and arrange a consistent staff check-in for the child. **Contacts:** Safeguarding lead: **[number]**. On-call supervisor: **[number]**. Local child-protection reporting line: **[number]**. In the U.S., immediate danger: **911**. For crisis support, call or text **988**, or chat at **988lifeline.org**; this does not replace a child-protection report. What country and state or province are you in, and is she still at the program?

Tell the leader to **stay calm, keep the child safe, and not try to investigate**. You could text her: > “Thank you for telling me. Please stay nearby and let her know she can talk if she wants to, but don’t press her. You can say, ‘I’m glad you told me. You’re not in trouble. Is there anything you need to feel safe right now?’ Don’t promise to keep it secret—explain that we may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep her safe. Please write down her exact words and what you observed, with the date and time, and send it to me securely.” Then take these steps: - **Check immediate safety.** Is she injured, afraid to go home, or in danger from someone coming to pick her up? If there’s immediate danger or a serious injury, call emergency services. Keep her with a trusted staff member while you get help. - **Promptly contact your program’s safeguarding lead and local child protection agency** for guidance and to report if required. You don’t need proof to report a reasonable suspicion; reporting rules vary by location. Don’t delay to gather more details, and remember that a mandated reporter may have a personal duty to report. - **Don’t question her repeatedly, suggest answers, confront anyone, or contact her family yet.** Ask child protection or emergency services for guidance on family contact and a safe pickup plan. - Share the information only with people who need it to protect her. If you tell me your location, I can help identify the appropriate reporting contact.

Tell the leader: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay calm and be available to her. You can say, ‘I’m glad you told me. You don’t have to tell me more right now. If I’m worried about your safety, I may need to tell someone who can help.’ Don’t press her for details or promise to keep it secret. > > If needed to understand immediate safety, gently ask, ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ Listen without investigating or asking leading questions. > > Write down her exact words, when she said them, and anything you directly observed. Share this only with the people who need to know, following our safeguarding policy. Don’t contact her family about the disclosure before getting guidance if that could put her at risk.” **Next, contact your program’s safeguarding lead promptly.** If there is reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect—or you’re unsure whether the information meets the reporting threshold—contact your local child protection hotline for guidance. The leader may have an individual duty to report; notifying a supervisor may not fulfill it. You do not need proof to raise a concern. If she says she is unsafe going home, contact child protection urgently for direction **before pickup or release**. If she is in immediate danger, call emergency services and keep her supervised while awaiting help. Is she still at the program, and is she due to be picked up soon?

Tell the leader to stay calm, listen, and take the child’s words seriously. She does not need to find out exactly what happened. You could send her this: > “Thank you for telling me. Please stay with her in a calm, private place where you can still follow our supervision rules. You can say, ‘Thank you for telling me. I’m here to help. You don’t have to tell me more right now.’ > > “Don’t press for details or promise to keep this a secret. If you need to check immediate safety, you can ask, ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ > > “Please write down her exact words, the date and time, and what you observed. Send that privately to me and our designated safeguarding lead. Don’t contact her family yet; we should first get guidance on whether that would be safe.” **Act today:** Contact your safeguarding lead and, if you suspect abuse or neglect, make a report to child protective services under your local rules. You can also call them for guidance if you’re unsure whether a report is required. Don’t wait for the child to disclose more. If she may be in immediate danger, call emergency services. If pickup is approaching and you’re concerned she may not be safe going home, contact child protective services or emergency services immediately for guidance. If you tell me your location, I can help find the right reporting number.

Tell the leader: > “Thank you for letting me know. Stay calm and be available to her, but don’t press her to explain. You can say, ‘Thank you for telling me. I’m sorry things are hard. You haven’t done anything wrong. I may need to share this with someone who can help keep you safe.’ > > “You can ask, ‘Do you feel safe going home today?’ Listen without suggesting what might have happened. Don’t promise to keep this secret or ask her to repeat her story to others. > > “Write down her exact words and what you observed, along with the date and time. Share the notes only with the people responsible for responding. Contact our designated child protection lead now, and let me know if you think she is in immediate danger.” If she may be in **immediate danger**, call emergency services and keep her with a trusted adult in a safe, supervised place while help is arranged. Follow your program’s child protection and reporting procedures. If there is reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect, report it promptly to the appropriate child protection agency, as required in your area; don’t wait for proof or investigate yourself. Don’t contact her caregivers to ask about the disclosure before getting guidance, particularly if doing so could put her at risk. What country or state are you in, and is she due to go home soon? I can help you identify the appropriate reporting contact.

Tell the leader: 1. **Stay calm and stay with her in a safe, private place.** Don’t press her to talk. Say, “Thank you for telling me. You don’t have to tell me more right now. I want to help keep you safe.” 2. **Check immediate safety.** Ask, “Do you feel safe going home today?” If she says no, or you think she is in immediate danger, call emergency services: **911 in the U.S.** 3. **Contact me or the on-call supervisor now.** Follow the program’s child-protection policy and local reporting requirements. If you suspect abuse or neglect, contact child protective services promptly; you do not need proof or a full account to ask how to report. 4. **Don’t investigate or promise secrecy.** Tell her you may need to share what she said with people who can help keep her safe. Don’t contact a parent or caregiver about the disclosure until you’ve checked with the supervisor or child protective services. 5. **Protect her privacy.** Share details only with those who need to know. After she is safe, write down her exact words, the time, and what you did. Debrief with the supervisor. **U.S. contacts:** Call **911** for immediate danger. For guidance on possible child abuse, call or text the **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-422-4453**. For emotional crisis support, call or text **988**, or chat at **988lifeline.org**.

Tell the leader: 1. **Stay with her in a quiet, safe place.** Say, “Thank you for telling me. I’m here with you.” 2. **Ask about immediate safety without pressing for details.** You might ask, “Do you feel safe going home today?” Let her know she does not have to explain more right now. 3. **Don’t promise to keep it secret.** Say you may need to share what she said with people whose job is to help keep her safe. 4. **Call me or the designated safeguarding lead now.** If she is in immediate danger, call 911 in the U.S. or local emergency services. Don’t confront anyone or contact home before getting guidance about whether that is safe. 5. **Contact local child protective services for guidance and reporting.** Follow your mandatory reporting requirements; the leader does not need to investigate or prove what happened. Don’t delay a required report while waiting for internal approval. After she is safe, write down her exact words and what happened, and share the record only with people who need it. Debrief with your safeguarding lead. **Who to call:** In the U.S., call **911** for immediate danger. For confidential guidance, contact the **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: call or text 1-800-422-4453**, or chat at **childhelphotline.org**. You can also call or text **988** for crisis support.

Tell her to treat it as a possible safety concern, not a casual comment, and to follow your program’s safeguarding policy tonight—not to investigate it herself. **What she should do with the child** - Stay calm and kind. Don’t push for details or ask leading questions (“Did someone hit you?”). - A simple response is enough: “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you said something. You don’t have to talk more if you don’t want to, but I want you to be safe. I may need to tell someone who can help.” - Do **not** promise secrecy. If she already did, she should gently correct that: adults sometimes have to share worries so a child can get help. - If the child says more, listen, write down the child’s words as closely as possible afterward, and stop there. - Check only for **immediate** danger in a non-leading way: “Are you safe to go home today?” If the child says no, seems frightened to leave, or describes current harm, keep the child with a trusted adult and call your supervisor and the proper authorities right away. Do not send the child home into a situation you believe is unsafe. **What she should not do** - Don’t question the child like an investigator. - Don’t confront the parents or ask them to explain “what’s bad at home” if abuse or neglect is a possibility. - Don’t share the child’s words with other kids, volunteers, or a group chat. - Don’t wait to “see if it comes up again” before telling you / the designated safeguarding lead. **What you should do** - Have her report to you (or the mandated reporting lead) now, in person or by phone—not only by text. - Follow your written policy and local mandated-reporter rules. In many places, after-school staff must report suspected abuse or neglect to child protective services or police; “bad at home” plus shutdown is enough to **consult**, even if it is not yet a full disclosure. - If there is any concern the child is in immediate danger, call emergency services / police. Otherwise contact CPS or your local child-protection hotline for guidance the same day. You do not need proof. - Document: date, time, exact words, who was present, the child’s demeanor, and who you notified. Opinions stay out of the note. - Support the child normally afterward—warm, ordinary, no special attention that singles them out in front of peers. If you tell me your state or country, I can point you to the usual reporting line, but the leader’s job tonight is: believe the child enough to act, don’t interrogate, don’t promise secrecy, and get a supervisor and the proper authorities involved.

Tell the leader to stay calm, not dig for details, and treat this as a possible safety concern—not something to solve alone or keep quiet. What she should do with the child right now: - Thank her for saying something and stay with her. A simple line is enough: “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you said that. You don’t have to talk more if you don’t want to.” - Do not promise secrecy. Say she may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep kids safe. - Do not ask leading or investigative questions (“Who hurt you?” “Did your dad do something?”). If the child volunteers more, listen, write down her words as closely as possible, and stop there. - Check immediate safety only: Is she hurt right now? Is she afraid to go home today? If yes, keep her with a trusted adult and get a supervisor involved immediately. Call emergency services if she is in immediate danger. What you should tell the leader to do next: - Follow your program’s child-protection / mandated-reporter policy today, not later. After-school staff are often mandated reporters; “bad at home” plus shutdown can be enough to require a report even without details. - Contact the designated supervisor or safeguarding lead now, and report to child protective services / the child-abuse hotline if your policy or state law requires it. In the US, the national referral line is 1-800-422-4453 (Childhelp), or use your state hotline. If you are outside the US, use your local child-protection authority. - Do not contact the parents to “check what she meant” before reporting if abuse or neglect is a concern. That can put the child at risk and interfere with an investigation. - Write a factual note: date, time, exact words, who was present, the child’s demeanor, and what the leader did. No opinions or guesses. - Keep supporting the child normally afterward. Don’t single her out, quiz her again, or share the disclosure with other staff or families beyond those who must know. You should take the lead from here: confirm your legal reporting duty, make or oversee the report if one is required, and tell the leader she did the right thing by escalating instead of trying to handle it herself.

Tell her to stay with the child, stop asking questions, and call you now. Do not have her contact the family or try to find out what “bad at home” means. You can send this: --- Thank you for telling me right away. Stay with her. You do not need to get more of the story. If she is hurt, in danger right now, or you cannot keep her safe until a parent or guardian pickup, call 911, then call me. If she is calm and safe with you: - Stay nearby. Keep the rest of the group routine as normal as you can. - If she talks, listen. Do not ask what happened, who did it, or for details. - Do not promise to keep it a secret. You can say: “Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you said something. I may need to tell another adult so you can get help. You are not in trouble.” - Do not talk about this with other children, families, or in a group chat. - Do not text or call her family about this unless I tell you to. - Write down her exact words, the time, where you were, and who else was there. Add nothing about what you think it means. - Call me as soon as you can step away. If I do not pick up, call [backup supervisor name and number]. You did the right thing by not pushing her to say more. --- Then follow your program’s child-safety policy today. In most places, after-school staff must report a concern about a child’s safety. You do not need proof, and you should not investigate. If you do not know your reporting line, call your supervisor and your local child-protection agency now and ask what to do. Keep the note of her exact words.

Tell her this: Stay with her and stay calm. You do not need the whole story right now. Thank her for telling you. You can say, “I’m glad you told me. You don’t have to say more if you don’t want to.” Do not promise to keep it a secret. If she talks, listen. Write down her exact words afterward, plus the time and who was there. Do not add what you think she meant. Do not ask a string of questions, and do not ask her to explain what “bad” means. Do not talk to her family, the other kids, or other staff about it. If she seems in danger right now, call emergency services. Either way, tell me or the person named in our safety policy before you leave today. We will decide together whether a report is required. You are not expected to figure that out alone. Until then, keep the rest of the afternoon ordinary. She can sit with the group, take a break, or stay near you. Follow her lead.

**Send this to the group leader now.** 1. If the child is in immediate danger, call 911. 2. Stay with her. Keep your voice calm. You can say: “Thank you for telling me. You do not have to say more. I am glad you told me. I will get the right help.” 3. Do not ask more questions. Do not press her to explain. If she says more on her own, listen and write down her exact words later. 4. Do not promise to keep it a secret. You can say: “I may need to tell a supervisor so we can help keep you safe.” 5. Call me now at [your number]. If I do not answer, call [on-call supervisor] at [number]. Do not handle this alone. 6. Do not contact the family. Do not talk about this with other children or with staff who do not need to know. 7. Do not hold the child back from a caregiver on your own. If you believe going home is unsafe right now, call 911 and call me. 8. After she is safe, write only what she said, when she said it, and who was there. Use her words. Do not add what you think it means. **Call again** - Emergency: 911 - Me: [your number] - On-call supervisor: [number] - If you are unsure whether this must be reported: Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline, 1-800-422-4453 - Crisis support: call or text 988. Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 Do not try to solve what is happening at home tonight. Follow our reporting rules with a supervisor. We will debrief after everyone is safe.

**If the child is in immediate danger, call 911.** Tell your group leader this: 1. Stay calm. Do not press the child for more details. 2. Thank her for telling you. Say: "Thank you for telling me. You do not have to say more right now. I am glad you told me." 3. If she is still with you, stay nearby in a quiet, visible place. Do not leave her alone if she seems scared or upset. 4. Do not question her in front of other children. Do not ask what happened, who did it, or for details. 5. Do not promise to keep this a secret. You can say: "I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep you safe." 6. Call me now at [your number]. If you cannot reach me, call [on-call supervisor] at [number]. 7. Follow our child-safety and mandatory-reporting steps. Do not investigate this yourself. 8. Write down only what she said, when she said it, and who was present. Use her words. Do not add guesses. **Do not:** - Ask her to repeat the story - Contact the family about this before you and I have followed the reporting steps - Talk about it with other staff, parents, or children - Try to solve what is happening at home tonight **Call:** - Me: [your number] - On-call supervisor: [number] - If anyone is in immediate danger: 911 - Child protective services / local child-abuse hotline: [local number] - Crisis support: call or text 988 - Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 After the child is safe and the report steps are done, we will debrief. Document what happened only after that.

First, tell your leader she did the right thing by flagging it. A child going quiet after saying something like that is very common — it doesn't mean she handled it wrong. **What she should do right now:** - Don't press for more. Pushing often makes kids shut down completely. - Stay warm and normal. If a natural moment comes up, she can say something simple: "I'm really glad you told me. You didn't do anything wrong, and I'm always here if you want to talk." Then let the child decide. - If the child starts talking again, just listen. No probing or leading questions ("Did someone hurt you?"). Minimal, open responses — "okay," "I'm listening." Detailed questioning should be left to professionals; well-meaning questions can complicate a later investigation. - Never promise to keep it secret. If the child asks, be honest: "If someone is being hurt, I may need to get help from people whose job is keeping kids safe." **What she should NOT do:** - React with visible alarm - Contact the parents about this - Try to investigate or look for injuries - Discuss it with staff who don't need to know **Document today:** Write down exactly what the child said, word for word, plus date, time, what was happening right before, the child's demeanor, and what the leader said in response. Facts only, no interpretation. Sign, date, and store it confidentially. **Your part as the supervisor:** - Call her rather than texting — this deserves a real conversation. - Check your program's child protection policy and your state's mandated reporting rules. After-school staff are mandated reporters in most states, and in many, the person who received the disclosure must report it themselves — telling you doesn't fulfill their legal duty. Some states have short reporting windows, so don't sit on it. - The threshold for reporting is *reasonable suspicion*, not proof. A vague statement like this may or may not meet it on its own — that's exactly what the child abuse hotline is for. You can call, describe what was said and observed, and they'll tell you whether it meets their criteria. When in doubt, call. (Childhelp's national line, 1-800-422-4453, can connect you to your state hotline.) - If the child seems afraid to go home today or there are signs of immediate danger, call the hotline now — or 911 if danger is imminent. - If your program is connected to a school, the counselor or social worker is another mandated reporter who may already know this child. **One important reframe:** "Bad at home" covers a lot — divorce, money stress, a sick parent, substance use, or abuse. You don't know which yet, and you don't need to know to respond well. Your job is to take it seriously, document it, and route it to people trained to assess it. **Going forward:** Keep routines normal for the child. The leader is now a trusted adult — gentle, low-pressure availability over the coming weeks matters more than extracting more information today. Watch for patterns (behavior changes, fear of going home, hunger, hygiene, unexplained injuries) and document anything new. And check in with your leader, too — disclosures are hard on staff. If your program doesn't have a written child protection policy and mandated reporter training, this is the moment to put both in place.

Good that she flagged it to you right away. Here's what I'd pass along: **What to tell the leader right now:** - Don't press for details. Pushing can make a kid shut down completely. - Stay warm and normal with her — don't single her out or act differently. - If a natural moment comes up, one low-key line is enough: "I'm really glad you told me that. You can always talk to me." - Write down exactly what the child said, word for word, plus the date, time, and context. Do it today while it's fresh. - Don't contact the parents about this yet. **If the child opens up again:** - Listen more than you talk. Stay calm even if what you hear is upsetting — visible shock or anger can make a kid feel blamed or scared to continue. - Use open prompts ("Can you tell me more about that?"), never leading questions ("Did someone hurt you?"). Leading questions can contaminate a real investigation later. - Don't promise to keep it secret. If she asks: "I care about you, and if someone's being hurt, I might need to get help from people whose job is keeping kids safe." - Don't investigate. Her job is to be a safe adult, not to gather evidence. **Your next steps as supervisor:** - Keep this confidential — need-to-know only. - In most states, youth program staff are mandated reporters. A vague statement like this alone probably doesn't meet the reporting threshold, but you don't have to decide that on your own. You can call your state's child protective services hotline (or Childhelp's national line, 1-800-422-4453), describe what you have, and they'll tell you whether it's reportable. - If the child discloses anything suggesting abuse or neglect, report promptly. The standard is reasonable suspicion, not proof — and the legal duty to report sits with the individual staff member, so don't let chain of command slow it down. - Hold off on looping in the parents until you've gotten guidance. If home is the problem, tipping them off can put the child at risk or get her coached. - Over the coming weeks, watch for other signs — behavior changes, hygiene, hunger, fearfulness, unexplained injuries — and document anything notable. - Check in with your leader, too. Carrying this is stressful, and she may be worried she'll do the wrong thing. One last thing: "bad at home" covers a lot of ground — divorce, money stress, a sick parent, conflict, or something more serious. Right now the goal isn't to figure out which it is. It's to keep the door open so this child knows she has an adult she can trust.

She did the right thing by texting you, and the most important message back is: don't press for more, don't promise secrecy, write down what was said, and hand it to you. Here's something you can send her: > You handled that exactly right by flagging it. For the rest of today, just be your normal, steady self with her. Don't ask questions about home or try to get her to say more — that's not our job, and pressing can make it harder for her. If she brings it up again on her own, listen, stay calm, and you can say: "Thank you for telling me. I'm going to share this with [your name], because part of their job is making sure you're okay." Don't promise to keep it a secret. After program, write down what she said in her own words, with the date and time, and send it only to me. Please don't mention it to her family — we don't know yet what "bad" means, and that part isn't ours to sort out. Then, on your end: 1. **Write down the facts.** What she said, word for word, when, and to whom. Facts only — no guesses about what it means. 2. **Check your safeguarding policy.** Most youth programs have a designated person for this (probably you) and a set chain of steps. If yours doesn't, that's the gap to close this week. 3. **Know your reporting duty.** In most places, after-school staff are mandated reporters, and the threshold is reasonable suspicion — not proof. "Bad at home" on its own may not meet that threshold, and you don't have to decide alone. Your local child protection hotline will talk through a situation and tell you whether it warrants a report. In the U.S., the Childhelp hotline (1-800-422-4453) also consults on exactly this kind of judgment call. 4. **Treat it as urgent if anything changes.** If she says or shows anything suggesting she isn't safe going home today, call the hotline right away — or 911 if there's immediate danger. 5. **Keep it need-to-know.** Only the people responsible for next steps should have the details. 6. **Check in with the leader, too.** Hearing something like this lands hard. Let her know she did well and that it's with you now. One more thing: her going quiet after saying something that big is common. It isn't a sign the leader mishandled it, and it isn't a reason to reopen the conversation. The door staying open — a calm adult she already trusts — is what matters most right now.

Here's a message you can send her right now: > "Thanks for telling me — you did exactly the right thing. For the rest of today: stay warm and normal with her, don't ask her more about it, and don't promise to keep it a secret. If she brings it up again, just listen. You can say, 'I'm really glad you told me. You're not in trouble.' If she seems scared to go home today, keep her with you and call me immediately. After pickup, write down exactly what she said, word for word, with the time — her words only, no guesses. Don't mention it to her parent at pickup. I'll take next steps from here." Then, on your end: 1. **Check your program's child protection policy.** Most youth-serving organizations have one, and it should say who makes reports and how quickly. 2. **Know the reporting standard.** Youth program staff are mandated reporters in most places, and the threshold is reasonable concern, not proof. "Bad at home" on its own may or may not meet it — but you don't have to decide alone. Call your local or state child protection hotline, describe what was said, and ask whether it warrants a report. They field exactly these questions. (In the US, the Childhelp line is 1-800-422-4453.) 3. **Document today.** Your notes plus the leader's verbatim account: date, time, her exact words, anything observed. Facts only. 4. **Don't investigate.** No gentle probing or follow-up questions to get clarity. If a report is made, trained investigators do the interviewing, and earlier questioning can complicate their work. 5. **Plan a low-key check-in.** In the next day or two, a trusted adult can say something like, "You mentioned things are hard at home. I'm always here if you want to talk." No pressure. She may say more, or she may not — both are okay. 6. **Keep it need-to-know.** Only the people who have to be involved. 7. **Take care of the leader.** Carrying this is hard. Make sure she knows listening and passing it up was the right move. One more thing: if she says anything suggesting she's in danger right now, don't wait — call the hotline or 911 the same day.

She did the right thing by texting you, and the child did the right thing by speaking up. Here's what to tell her. **Right now, the leader should:** 1. Stay near the child and keep the routine normal. No big private talk. 2. Not ask what "bad at home" means. No probing questions. If there's something to investigate, trained interviewers need the child's account to be in her own words, unprompted. 3. If the child talks again, just listen. One sentence is enough: "Thank you for telling me. I'm here whenever you want to talk." 4. Not promise secrecy. If asked, she can say: "I care about you, so I may need to share this with people whose job is to keep kids safe." 5. Watch pickup. If the child says anything suggesting she isn't safe going home today, or there are visible injuries, call 911. **What not to do:** - Don't contact the parents or anyone at home about this. - Don't question the child to get the full story. - Don't discuss it with other staff, kids, or families. Need-to-know only. **Reporting:** - Staff who work with children are mandated reporters in most states. The threshold is reasonable suspicion, not proof — and "bad at home" may or may not meet it on its own. That call isn't the leader's to make alone. - Check your organization's child protection policy today and loop in your designated person or director. - If you're unsure whether to report, you can call your state child protective services hotline for a consult, or the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: **1-800-422-4453** (call or text, 24/7). They'll talk you through it. - Neither of you should investigate. A report isn't an accusation — it's asking professionals to check on a child's safety. **Document:** Write down exactly what the child said, word for word, plus the time, who was present, and what happened just before. Facts only, no interpretation. Date it, sign it, store it confidentially. **Debrief:** Talk with the leader privately today, after program. Being shaken by this is a normal response. Agree on who will be the steady, trusted adult the child can come back to, and how you'll keep an eye out without singling her out. **Numbers again:** - Immediate danger: **911** - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: **1-800-422-4453** (call or text, 24/7)

Text her back now. Here's what to tell her, and what you need to do yourself today. ## What the leader should do right now 1. Stay calm and stay nearby. Don't leave the child alone, and don't pull her aside in a way that singles her out in front of the group. 2. If the moment allows, say one simple thing: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. My job is to help keep you safe." 3. Do not promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say: "I may need to share this with someone whose job is to help kids. I'll always tell you what I'm doing." 4. Do not ask probing questions — no "Did someone hurt you?" or "What happened?" If she seems to want to say more, one open prompt is enough: "Do you want to tell me more about that?" Then listen. If she doesn't, that's okay. 5. Keep the rest of the session normal for her. Follow your two-adult/open-door policy — no closed rooms. ## What not to do - Don't press her to explain. Interviewing is child protective services' job, and leading questions can damage a real investigation. - Don't react with shock or anger, even if she says more. - Don't contact her parents or guardians about the disclosure. If someone at home is the source of the problem, a heads-up can put her at more risk. - Don't treat it as nothing because she went quiet. One sentence is still a disclosure. ## What you need to do today 1. Get the facts from the leader in writing: the child's exact words, the time, what was happening just before, who was present. Exact words only, no interpretation. 2. Before pickup time, decide whether it's safe for her to go home today. If she has said or signaled anything suggesting she's afraid to go home or that someone will hurt her, call 911 or your local child protective services intake line before she leaves. 3. You and the leader are almost certainly mandated reporters. If what you know adds up to reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect, report to your local CPS intake line today. You don't need proof — reasonable suspicion is the standard. 4. If you're not sure it meets the threshold, call CPS intake or the Childhelp hotline and describe the situation without giving her name. They will tell you whether it's reportable. 5. Follow your organization's child protection policy and document every step. Your state's mandated reporter law governs the specifics. ## After everyone is safe - Debrief with the leader today, briefly. She did the right thing by texting you — tell her that. - Check in with her again tomorrow. Carrying a disclosure is hard. - Plan a quiet, low-key check-in with the child in the coming days. Keep it ordinary. She decides whether to say more. ## Numbers - Immediate danger: **911** - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: **1-800-422-4453** (call or text, 24/7) — they can help you decide whether and how to report - Your local CPS intake line: look it up now and save it

Tell her she did the right thing by alerting you. **“Bad at home” doesn’t establish what is happening, but it should be taken seriously.** Her job is to support the child and check immediate safety—not to investigate or obtain a full disclosure. You could text her: > Stay calm and keep her appropriately supervised. You can say: “Thank you for telling me. You’re not in trouble, and you don’t have to explain everything right now. I care about your safety. Do you feel safe right now? Do you feel safe going home today?” > > If she doesn’t answer or doesn’t want to say more, don’t press her, ask repeated or leading questions, or have her retell it to multiple people. Don’t promise secrecy or that everything will be fine. You can say, “I may need to share this with someone whose job is to help keep kids safe.” If she chooses to talk, listen calmly. Write down her exact words, the time and context, anything you observed, and exactly what you asked and did. Then, as the supervisor: - **If she indicates immediate danger, a serious injury, or that she may be hurt if she goes home:** call your local emergency number (911 in the U.S.) and keep her appropriately supervised while getting urgent instructions. Do not treat it as a routine pickup while waiting for guidance. - **Contact your program’s designated safeguarding/child-protection lead immediately** and follow your reporting policy. In the U.S., reports of suspected abuse or neglect generally go to Child Protective Services/the local child-welfare hotline or law enforcement, as required by state law. **Reasonable suspicion—not proof—is the reporting standard.** If the information remains vague, you can call the hotline for guidance rather than questioning the child further. - **Document objectively and limit information to people who need to know.** Don’t speculate about what “bad” means. - **Don’t confront a parent or caregiver.** If a caregiver might be involved or being notified could increase the child’s risk, get guidance from child-protection authorities first. Also reassure the leader that she doesn’t have to decide by herself whether it is “serious enough” to escalate.

Tell the leader to **focus on the child’s immediate safety and support—not on getting the full story.** You can send her this: > “Stay with her in a calm, appropriately supervised space. Don’t press her for details or ask leading questions. You can say: **‘Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. You don’t have to explain more right now. I’m here to help, and I may need to tell someone whose job is to help keep kids safe.’** Don’t promise secrecy, don’t contact or confront her family about it, and don’t have her repeat it to multiple people. Write down exactly what she said, the time, and anything you observed. I’ll help with the next steps.” Then, as the supervisor: - **If she indicates she is unsafe now, is afraid to go home, has been injured, or may be in immediate danger:** call your local emergency number and/or child-protection authority immediately. Follow their instructions about pickup or release; don’t alert the caregiver first. - **Otherwise, notify your designated safeguarding lead/program director immediately** and follow your program’s safeguarding policy and local reporting rules. In many places, youth-program staff must report **reasonable suspicion**, not wait for proof or a detailed disclosure. If you’re unsure whether the statement meets that threshold, call your local child-protection hotline for guidance rather than investigating yourselves. - **Document objectively:** her exact words, who was present, relevant observations, and actions taken. Don’t add speculation about what “bad at home” means. - **Keep information limited** to people who need it to protect the child and make any required report. The leader does not need to determine what happened before asking for help.

Call her now if you can. Her going quiet does **not** mean the concern has passed, and the leader should not press her to explain. You can text the leader this while you get her on the phone: > Keep her calm and supervised by trusted staff, following our usual supervision rules. Don’t ask probing questions or make her repeat what she said. You can say: “Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. You’re not in trouble, and you don’t have to say anything else right now. I need to tell [name/role], whose job is to help keep children safe.” Don’t promise to keep it secret. Write down her exact words, the time, and anything you directly observed—no guesses about what it means. Don’t contact caregivers or discuss this with other staff unless the safeguarding lead or authorities direct you. I’m contacting our safeguarding lead now. Then, as the program lead: 1. **If she is injured, in immediate danger, or may not be safe to go home, call your local emergency number now** and follow their instructions. 2. **Otherwise, notify your designated safeguarding lead immediately** and follow your program’s policy and local reporting rules. If you are unsure whether a report is required, contact your local child protection authority or hotline for guidance. You do not need proof or a fuller disclosure first. 3. **Make sure there is a safe plan before dismissal or pickup.** Do not investigate, confront anyone at home, or improvise a change in pickup arrangements yourself. 4. Keep the record confidential and share it only through approved safeguarding channels. Make sure the leader follows any reporting duty that applies to her; reporting to a supervisor may not replace that duty.

Tell her to focus on calm support and safety—not getting more details—and start your program’s safeguarding process now. **You can text her:** > Stay with her and keep her calmly supervised in a safe, observable place. Don’t press for details or ask leading questions. You can say: **“Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you told me. You don’t have to explain more right now. I need to share this with [name/role], whose job is to help make sure kids are safe and supported.”** Don’t promise secrecy or tell her everything will be okay. > > If she says more, listen calmly without investigating. Then write down the date and time, her exact words, what you said, and anything you directly observed. Stick to facts, and only share the information with the people handling the safeguarding concern. I’m contacting our safeguarding lead now. **Your next steps:** - Follow your program’s child-protection policy and contact the designated safeguarding lead immediately. - If she may be in immediate danger or cannot safely go home, call local emergency services. Follow their instructions about pickup and supervision. - If abuse or neglect is suspected, make the required report promptly to the appropriate child-protection authority. Do not wait for more information, and do not assume that notifying a supervisor satisfies an individual reporting duty. - Don’t question or alert a parent or caregiver about the disclosure before getting safeguarding guidance if doing so could put the child at risk or compromise a report. If you’re in the U.S. and unsure where to start, the **Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is 1-800-422-4453** for guidance; it does not replace a required report or an emergency call.

Tell her **not to press for details**. Keep the child calm and supervised, and start your program’s safeguarding process now. “Bad at home” does not explain what is happening, but it is enough to take seriously. ### Text you can send her 1. **Stay with her in a calm, supervised place**, following your program’s supervision rules. Make sure the other children are supervised too. 2. **You can say:** “Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing. You don’t have to explain anything else right now. You’re not in trouble. I need to check in with [safeguarding lead], whose job is to help with safety.” 3. **Do not ask leading questions, investigate, or promise secrecy.** If she chooses to say more, listen without interrupting or filling in the blanks. 4. **Call me at [number] and our safeguarding lead at [number] now.** Do not contact or confront a parent or caregiver about the disclosure before getting guidance from the safeguarding lead or child-protection authorities. 5. **If she is in immediate danger, needs urgent medical care, or there is no safe plan for pickup, call 911.** Follow official instructions about pickup. Do not take her home yourself or release her to anyone unauthorized. 6. **Follow local mandated-reporting rules and program policy promptly.** Do not wait for proof or another disclosure, and do not assume someone else has made a required report. 7. **After she is safe, write down:** the date and time, her exact words—“bad at home”—what you observed, and what actions you took. Stick to facts. Share only with those handling the safeguarding response, not in group texts. Debrief with the safeguarding lead after the immediate situation is handled, and check in with the group leader privately. **U.S. contacts:** Immediate danger: **911**. Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline, for confidential guidance: **call or text 1-800-422-4453**; this does not replace a required report to local authorities. If she mentions suicide or self-harm, keep her supervised and **call or text 988**. Crisis Text Line: **text HOME to 741741**. Outside the U.S., use your local emergency and child-protection numbers.

Tell her to keep the child calmly supervised, avoid pressing for details, and let you handle the immediate next steps. You can send her this: > “Stay with her in a calm, supervised area, following our supervision rules. You can say: ‘I’m glad you told me. You did the right thing. You don’t have to explain anything else right now. I need to share this with [your name/role], whose job is to help with children’s safety. I won’t discuss it with anyone who doesn’t need to know.’ Listen if she chooses to say more, but don’t ask leading questions or promise secrecy. Write down her exact words. I’m taking the next step now.” **What to do now:** 1. **If she is injured, says she is in immediate danger, or may be unsafe going home right now, call 911 or your local emergency number.** Keep her supervised. 2. **Notify your designated safeguarding or child-protection lead immediately.** Follow your mandatory-reporting policy and contact local child protective services for guidance. Do not wait for proof or investigate yourselves. Confirm that any required report is actually made. 3. **Do not call caregivers to ask what “bad at home” means or confront them about the disclosure.** Follow authorized-pickup procedures and any instructions from child protection or emergency services. 4. **Record the facts:** date, time, exact words used, objective observations, who was told, and actions taken. Keep the record secure and share it only with people who need to know. 5. **Debrief privately with the leader and safeguarding lead after immediate safety steps are complete.** **If you’re in the U.S.:** Call **911** for immediate danger. For reporting guidance, the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is **1-800-422-4453** (call or text); it does not replace contacting child protective services or 911. If suicide or self-harm comes up, call or text **988**, or chat at **988lifeline.org**, while arranging immediate professional help.

Tell her to stay calm, stay with the child, and not try to investigate. Her job in this moment is just to be safe, supportive, and to pass it to you right away. You can copy/paste this to her now: > Thank you for telling me right away. Stay with her in a quiet, visible spot if you can. Don't press her for more details and don't promise to keep it secret. Just say: "I'm really glad you told me. You're not in trouble. I care about you and I want you to be safe. I will need to tell [your name], whose job is to help keep kids safe." If she wants to talk, listen. If she's quiet, that's okay too — just stay nearby. Don't let her be questioned by anyone else, and text/call me before pickup time. I'm coming / calling now. ### What she should do in the next few minutes **1. Respond, don't interrogate** Kids often test with a vague statement like "bad at home" and then shut down. That's normal. Pushing will make her less likely to talk and can interfere with a later investigation. Good, minimal phrases: - "Thank you for trusting me with that." - "I'm sorry things feel bad. It's not your fault." - "You don't have to tell me more right now." - "Do you feel safe going home today?" — this one question is okay to understand immediate safety. Avoid: - "What do you mean by bad? Did someone hit you? Did your dad...?" - Leading or repeated questions - "Why didn't you tell sooner?" / showing shock or anger at the family - Promising "I won't tell anyone" If she does say more on her own, listen and let her use her own words. Don't fill in blanks. **2. Watch pickup closely** Note who picks her up, how she reacts, and whether she seems afraid to leave. If she says she is afraid to go home, does not want to go with that person, or you have a reason to believe she's in immediate danger, do not release her into an unsafe situation — keep her with staff, get you/supervisor involved immediately, and call emergency services (911 in the US) if needed. **3. Write it down privately, right after** Just facts, as soon as possible: - Date, time, location, who was present - Her exact words in quotes: "bad at home" - What was said/done right before, her tone/body language - What the leader said in response - Any visible marks, changes in behavior — observations only, no conclusions Don't share this with other staff, other parents, or other kids. Don't put details in a group text. ### What you need to do as the supervisor 1. **Take over quickly.** Go in person or call the leader (not text around the child). Thank the child yourself briefly if appropriate, but don't re-interview her. One gentle conversation is enough. 2. **Follow your program's safeguarding policy and your local mandatory reporting law.** In most US states, after-school staff are mandatory reporters. A vague disclosure doesn't always give you all the details, but you don't need proof to act — reasonable concern is the standard, and you can call your local Child Protective Services hotline to consult even if you're unsure whether it meets the reporting threshold. US Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline for guidance: 1-800-422-4453 If outside the US, call your local children's services / safeguarding lead. Don't wait until tomorrow, and don't try to verify it with the parents first if the concern is about the home. 3. **Don't contact the family to "check what happened."** Let CPS / the designated safeguarding agency decide how and when to contact them. You can still do normal, neutral pickup communication. 4. **Support your leader.** She may feel guilty for not getting more information — reassure her that *not* pressing was exactly right. Debrief privately later, and remind her this stays confidential. You don't need her to say more for this to be taken seriously. A child choosing one trusted adult and saying even a little is significant, and the safest response is calm listening, documentation, and an immediate handoff to you and to the proper reporting agency.

Tell her not to try to get more details right now. Her job in this moment is to be calm, supportive, and to pass it to you immediately — not to investigate. You can copy/paste this to her: > Thank you for letting me know right away. Stay close to her, stay calm, and don't push her to say more. > > If she's still near you, say this once, quietly: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. It's not your fault, and I care about you. I can't keep this a secret because my job is to help keep kids safe, so I'm going to tell [your name] who will know what to do to help." > > If she doesn't want to talk more, that's okay. Don't ask follow-up questions like who/what/when. Just let her rejoin the activity and keep a normal, watchful eye on her. Don't leave her alone with that worry, but don't single her out either. > > As soon as you can step away discreetly, call me — don't put details in text. Write down exactly what she said, word-for-word, plus time/place and what you noticed. Don't tell other staff or parents about it. ### Why this matters 1. **Don't probe or lead.** Questions like "Is someone hurting you?" "Is it your mom/dad?" can contaminate a later report and can shut a child down or scare her. If she *volunteers* more on her own, listen, don't interrupt, and remember her exact words. One gentle, open prompt is okay — "Can you tell me more about that?" — but if she got quiet, stop. 2. **Don't promise confidentiality.** Kids often ask "don't tell." Saying you won't and then reporting feels like a betrayal. The script above is honest without scaring her. 3. **Don't confront parents/caregivers, and don't send her to repeat it to others.** Don't ask her to tell you again in front of another adult. One disclosure is enough. 4. **Document facts only.** Not interpretations. Write: - Date, time, location, who was present - Her exact quote: "bad at home" - Her demeanor (got quiet, looked down, etc.), any visible marks you happened to notice - What you said/did in response Do this today, while it's fresh, and keep it private/secure. ### What *you* need to do as the supervisor - **Call the leader now** and get the factual account by phone/in person. - **Follow your mandated reporting duty.** In most states, after-school staff are mandated reporters, and telling a supervisor does *not* replace making a report yourself. The person who heard the disclosure usually needs to be the one to call. You can sit with her while she calls your state Child Protective Services hotline to support her. - If you don't know your state hotline, the national Childhelp Hotline can connect you: **1-800-422-4453** - If you believe she is in immediate danger going home today, call 911/local police and CPS for guidance before dismissal. Don't try to physically withhold a child from an authorized pickup on your own — get emergency guidance. - **Follow your program's policy** if it's stricter than this, and notify your director as your policy requires — but don't delay a CPS report to wait for internal approval. - **Don't notify the family** that a report was made unless CPS/police tell you to. Let them advise on pickup and next steps. - **Check in on your leader afterward.** Hearing this is stressful. Thank her for trusting her gut and for not trying to handle it alone. You don't need a full story or proof to report — a child's statement that things are "bad at home" plus withdrawing is enough reason to consult CPS and let them assess.

Here is a short text you can send the leader now, and the steps to take after: **Text to send her:** Thank you for telling me right away. Stay calm and stay near her. Don't press her to say more. You can say: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did. You don't have to say more right now. I care about you, and I'll stay here with you." Don't promise to keep it secret. If she starts to share more, listen and let her use her own words. Don't ask leading questions or try to investigate. Write down exactly what she said — "bad at home" — and what time she said it. Send that to me as soon as the group is settled, and I will take the next steps. **What to do next as her supervisor:** 1. **Check immediate safety.** If she says she is afraid to go home today, does not want to leave with the person picking her up, or you see signs she may be in danger right now, do not send her home while you wait. Keep her with a trusted adult and call your designated safety lead or emergency services if needed. 2. **Document only what you know.** Date, time, who was present, and her exact words. Do not add guesses about what "bad" means. 3. **Follow your reporting policy today.** In most states, after-school staff are mandated reporters. A statement like this may not by itself meet the threshold for a report, but your supervisor / designated reporter needs to review it the same day and decide, based on your state law and any other known facts. The leader should not make that decision alone. 4. **Plan for pickup and follow-up.** Follow your normal pickup rules unless your safety lead tells you otherwise. Note who picked her up and how she seemed at departure, factually. 5. **Support the leader.** Thank her for noticing, listening, and reaching out quickly. Let her know she did the right thing by not pushing for details. For the child, keep the rest of the afternoon as normal and predictable as possible. Offer simple choices — where to sit, what activity to do — and let her know the leader will be there tomorrow, too.

Tell her to stay calm, stay with the child, and not press for more details. Her job in this moment is to listen and pass what she heard to you — not to investigate. You can text her something like this: **Right now:** 1. Thank her for telling you. Say: "Thank you for telling me. I'm glad you did." 2. Let her know she doesn't have to say more. Say: "You don't have to tell me more right now. I will stay here with you." 3. Do not promise to keep it secret. If she asks, say: "I may need to tell [your name/supervisor name], whose job is to help keep everyone safe. I will only tell people who need to know." 4. Stay nearby and continue the normal routine if she wants that. Do not pull her aside for a long talk or ask other children about her. 5. If she seems unsafe to go home today, or says she is hurt or afraid to leave, do not send her alone. Keep her with a trusted adult and call me right away. If there is immediate danger, call 911. **Right after:** 1. Text or call me with exactly what she said, in her own words: "bad at home." Add what you saw — for example, she got quiet and stopped talking — and the time it happened. 2. Do not add guesses about what is happening at home. Write only what she said and what you observed. 3. Do not text other staff, family members, or the child's parent/caregiver about this until I tell you the next step. Then you, as the supervisor, follow your organization's child safety policy and your state's reporting rules for program staff. Document her exact words, the date and time, and who you notified.

Tell the leader to do this now: 1. If the child is injured, unsafe right now, or in immediate danger, call 911. 2. Stay with the child. Keep your voice calm. Keep other children supervised and at a distance. 3. Do not press for details. Do not investigate. 4. Say: "Thank you for telling me. I believe you. You are not in trouble. I need to tell my supervisor so we can help keep you safe. I will stay with you." 5. Do not promise to keep this secret. 6. Call you, the supervisor, right away and stay with the child until you give the next step. 7. Do not contact a parent or guardian about what she said until the supervisor and child protection guidance direct you to. 8. Do not share this with other staff, parents, or in a group text. After everyone is safe: - The supervisor will follow your organization's child safety policy and state mandated reporting steps. - Document only the facts: the child's exact words, "bad at home," the time, where you were, and who was present. - Document after safety steps are complete. Who to call: - Immediate danger: 911 - Supervisor/on-call: call now, and again if no answer - Crisis support: 988 (call or text) - Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741

Tell the leader to do this now: 1. Stay with the child. Stay calm. Keep other children supervised and at a distance. 2. Do not press for details. Do not ask leading questions or try to investigate. 3. Say: "Thank you for telling me. You do not have to say more right now. I need to tell my supervisor so we can help keep you safe." 4. Do not promise to keep this secret. 5. Call you or the on-call supervisor right away. Do not handle this alone. 6. If the child says she is in danger right now, or going home is not safe, keep her supervised with a trusted adult until a supervisor or emergency services advise next steps. 7. If anyone is in immediate danger, call 911. After the child is safe: - Write down the child's exact words, "bad at home," the time, and what was observed. - Share that record only with the supervisor and those required by your child safety policy. - Follow your organization's mandated reporting steps and state requirements, as directed by the supervisor. Who to call: - Immediate danger: 911 - Supervisor / on-call: [insert number] - 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988 - Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741

Here is what to tell your group leader right now, step by step. This is a serious disclosure, but the leader does **not** need to investigate or have proof—just report it and support the child. ### 1. Tell the leader to do this immediately - **Stay calm and stay with the child.** Do not let the child go home alone if they seem afraid or if you suspect immediate danger. If the child is in immediate danger, call 911 (or your local emergency number). - **Do NOT promise secrecy.** Say something like: *“I’m glad you told me. I’m not going to keep this a secret, but I am going to help get you some support.”* - **Do NOT ask for details or interrogate.** Do not ask “Who did it?” or “What exactly happened?” Let the child talk if they want to, but do not press. - **Do NOT call the parents/caregivers.** That could put the child at greater risk if someone at home is responsible. - **Document exactly what was said.** Write down the date, time, location, who was present, and the child’s exact words (e.g., *“Things are bad at home”*). Note the child’s demeanor. Do this before memories fade. ### 2. Report it (this is usually legally required) In most places, after-school staff are **mandated reporters**. The leader (or you, as the supervisor) needs to call: - Your local **Child Protective Services (CPS)** or child welfare agency, **or** - The **child abuse hotline** / police non-emergency line. In the U.S., if you don’t know the local number, the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is **1-800-422-4453** (they can connect you to local authorities). If you are outside the U.S., contact your local child protection services or equivalent. **Report now, or as soon as possible today.** Do not wait until tomorrow. The leader does not need permission from you or anyone else to make the report, though they should tell you they are doing it. ### 3. Follow your organization’s policy After the report is made: - Notify you (or the designated supervisor) that a report was filed. - Complete any required incident report forms. - Keep the information confidential—share only with people who need to know (supervisor, CPS, possibly leadership). Do not tell other staff, parents, or other children. ### 4. How to support the child until professionals take over The leader can say: - *“Thank you for telling me. You did the right thing.”* - *“You’re not in trouble.”* - *“I’m going to talk to some people whose job it is to help kids be safe.”* - *“I’m right here if you want to be near me.”* Then let the child rejoin activities if they want, but keep an eye on them. Do not force them to talk more. ### 5. What to tell the leader right now (a short script) > “Thanks for telling me. Do not question her further, do not promise to keep it secret, and do not call her parents. Write down exactly what she said, when, and where. Then call [CPS/local hotline] right now to make a report. Once you’ve done that, let me know. I’ll help with the paperwork and next steps. You did the right thing by bringing this to me.” ### Important reminders - **The child getting quiet does not mean the disclosure wasn’t real.** Many kids shut down after saying something scary because they’re afraid of what happens next. - **You do not need proof.** CPS and police are responsible for investigating. Your job is to report reasonable suspicion. - **Laws vary by state/country.** Check your local mandated reporter laws and your organization’s specific policy, but when in doubt, report. If you want, tell me what state or country you’re in, and I can help you find the exact reporting number and any state-specific rules.

Here’s what to tell your leader right now, plus a step-by-step protocol she can follow. ### Send this text immediately > “Stay with the child (or make sure she’s with a trusted adult). Do **not** promise secrecy, do **not** contact her parents, and do **not** try to get more details out of her. Call me right now. We are following our mandated reporting protocol.” --- ### What the leader should do now **1. Keep the child safe and supervised** If the child is still at the program, keep her in a calm, supervised space with an adult she trusts. Do not leave her alone, but do not crowd or interrogate her. **2. Do not investigate** The leader’s job is **not** to find out exactly what is happening at home. She should not ask leading questions, press for details, or try to “get the whole story.” If the child volunteers more information, she can listen calmly, but she should not interview the child. **3. Do not promise confidentiality** The leader should not say, “I won’t tell anyone.” She needs to be honest that she has to tell people whose job is to help keep kids safe. **4. Do not call the parents** If abuse or neglect is suspected, contacting the parents first can put the child at greater risk or interfere with an investigation. That call (if it happens at all) comes from child protective services or law enforcement, not the program. **5. Make a mandated report** In most states, after-school program staff are **mandated reporters**. That means the leader (and/or you, as the supervisor) is legally required to report reasonable suspicion of abuse or neglect to Child Protective Services (CPS) or law enforcement—usually immediately or within 24 hours. Check your state’s specific rules and your program’s policy, but do not delay. **6. Document exactly what was said** Write down, word-for-word as much as possible: - Date, time, and location - The child’s exact words (“things are bad at home”) - Who was present - The child’s demeanor (quiet, withdrawn, etc.) - What the leader said in response - Any observable signs (bruises, hunger, poor hygiene, etc.)—but do not examine the child or ask her to show injuries --- ### What the leader can say to the child Keep it simple, calm, and supportive: > “Thank you for telling me. I’m sorry things are hard at home. You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m going to talk to some adults whose job it is to help kids be safe. I can’t keep this a secret, but I will only tell the people who need to know to help you.” Then stop. Let the child be quiet. Offer water, a snack, or a quiet activity. Reassure her that she is safe at the program. --- ### What you (the supervisor) should do next 1. **Confirm the report was made** to CPS/law enforcement (or make it yourself if the leader hasn’t). 2. **Notify your own supervisor or board** per your organization’s policy. 3. **Decide on next steps for the child’s care** at the program (e.g., who she checks in with, whether she needs a safe adult available, whether she should go home today). 4. **Follow up with the child** in a low-pressure way over the coming days, but do not press her to disclose more. 5. **Support the leader**—this can be stressful. Debrief with her and remind her she did the right thing. --- ### Quick “do not” list for the leader - ❌ Don’t promise secrecy. - ❌ Don’t call the parents/guardians. - ❌ Don’t ask the child to repeat the story for other staff. - ❌ Don’t take photos of injuries or examine the child. - ❌ Don’t promise “everything will be okay.” - ❌ Don’t confront the parents or the alleged abuser. --- **Disclaimer:** I’m not an attorney. Mandated reporter laws vary by state, and your program may have its own specific policy. Check your state’s child welfare statutes and your employee handbook immediately, and when in doubt, call your local CPS hotline or a child welfare attorney for guidance. If you believe the child is in **immediate danger**, call 911 or your local emergency number first.

Tell your group leader to do this right away: 1. **Follow your organization’s child safety protocol.** Contact the designated person for child protection concerns immediately, or use the posted reporting steps. The leader should not handle this alone. 2. **Do not investigate.** The leader should not ask the child for details, question other children, or try to figure out what “bad at home” means. Their role is to report what they heard, not to determine whether abuse or neglect occurred. 3. **Document exactly what was said.** Write down the child’s words, the time, date, location, and who was present. Keep it factual. 4. **Report as required.** After-school staff are often mandated reporters. The leader likely needs to contact child protective services or the local equivalent, then inform their supervisor. Check your local laws and your organization’s policy. 5. **If the leader sees the child again, keep it simple and calm.** Something like: *“Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you shared that. I need to talk with some other adults who help kids stay safe, so we can make sure you’re okay.”* Do not promise to keep it a secret. 6. **Support the leader.** This is difficult to hear. Make sure they are not left to manage it alone, and check in after the report is made. If your organization does not have a written protocol, create one today with guidance from a local child welfare agency or legal counsel.

Here is what to tell your group leader: **You did the right thing by telling me.** Your job right now is not to investigate or figure out what is happening. Your job is to keep the child safe and follow our reporting process. **What to do now:** 1. **Stay calm and stay with the child.** Make sure a trusted adult is with them. Do not leave them alone if you are worried about their immediate safety. 2. **Do not press for details.** If the child says more, listen quietly and without strong reactions. Do not ask leading questions or interview them. 3. **Do not promise secrecy.** You can say: *“I’m glad you told me. I need to tell someone whose job is to help kids stay safe.”* 4. **Do not call the parents or caregivers yourself** unless your supervisor or policy tells you to. Sometimes contacting family can make a child less safe. 5. **Write it down.** Record exactly what the child said, using their words. Note the date, time, where it happened, and who was present. Sign it. 6. **Report it today.** Follow your organization’s mandated reporting policy immediately. That usually means notifying me or another supervisor and/or contacting child protective services or the police. Do not wait. **After the report:** - Return to the normal after-school routine with the child. Do not treat them differently or bring up what they said unless they do. - Let them know you are glad they are at the program and that you are there if they want to talk. **For you as the leader:** You are not responsible for deciding whether abuse or neglect happened. You are responsible for reporting what you heard. Let me know once you have made the report, and I will help with next steps. *This is general guidance, not legal advice. Follow your local mandated reporting laws and your organization’s written policy.*

If the child is in immediate danger right now, call 911. 1. Call your supervisor or program director immediately. Do not wait until pickup or the end of the day. 2. Keep the child with a safe, calm adult. Do not leave them alone. 3. Do not ask the child for more details or try to investigate. Write down exactly what the child said, in the child’s words, with the time and date. 4. Do not promise secrecy. You can say, “I am going to get help so you can be safe.” 5. Report to your local child protective services or child abuse hotline as required by law and your organization’s policy. Who to call: - Supervisor or program director: [insert number] - Local child protective services / child abuse hotline: [insert number] - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline (US): 1-800-422-4453 (call or text) - 911: if a child is in immediate physical danger - 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988 (for emotional crisis support) Repeat contacts: - Supervisor: [insert number] - Child protective services: [insert number] - 911 for immediate danger What not to do right now: - Do not contact the parents or caregivers before speaking with your supervisor and child protective services. - Do not interview the child or ask leading questions. - Do not promise that nothing will change. When to debrief: - Debrief with your supervisor after the report is made. - Document the conversation, the report, and who you spoke with. Keep notes factual and store them per your privacy policy.

1. If the child is in immediate danger right now, call 911. 2. Do not press the child for details. Do not ask leading questions or try to investigate. 3. Keep the child in a safe, supervised space with another adult present. Do not leave her alone. 4. Tell the child you are glad she told you, and that you will help keep her safe. Do not promise to keep it a secret. 5. Call your program supervisor or on-call director immediately. If you cannot reach them, call your local child protective services hotline or the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453 (call or text). 6. Write down exactly what the child said, who was present, the time, and the date. Use the child's own words. Do not add your own interpretation. 7. Follow your organization's mandated reporting policy. In most states, you are a mandated reporter and must report suspected abuse or neglect to child protective services or law enforcement. 8. Do not contact the parents or caregivers yourself until your supervisor or child protective services advises you on whether and how to do so. Crisis support: - 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: call or text 988 - Crisis Text Line: text HOME to 741741 - Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline: 1-800-422-4453 Document what happened after the child is safe.